Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.5)
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. I largely agree with this opinion because, although academic education is important, children also need time to play and develop their social and creative skills.
Formal learning is essential for young children because primary school provides the basic knowledge they will need in the future. Reading, writing and mathematics are particularly important because they form the foundation for secondary education. For example, children who develop strong reading skills at an early age are more likely to understand textbooks and perform well in other subjects. Therefore, schools should certainly provide regular academic lessons.
However, I believe that too much formal learning can put unnecessary pressure on young children. At this age, they learn effectively through activities, games and interaction with others. Playing is important because it helps children develop communication, teamwork, creativity and problem-solving skills. For instance, when children participate in team games, they learn how to cooperate, follow rules and respect other people. These skills cannot always be taught through traditional classroom lessons.
Moreover, play can also make academic learning more effective. Teachers can use educational games, role-playing and practical activities to teach subjects in an enjoyable way. For example, mathematics can be taught through counting games, which may help children understand numbers more easily while keeping them interested in the lesson.
In conclusion,I agree that primary schools can sometimes place too much emphasis on formal education. Nevertheless, academic learning remains necessary. The best approach is to combine structured lessons with regular opportunities for play, allowing children to develop both academically and personally.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.5 |
| Overall | 7.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5
The response fully addresses both parts of the prompt. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout the essay. The arguments regarding the necessity of formal learning and the benefits of play are well-developed and supported with relevant examples, such as the mention of team games for social skills and counting games for mathematics. The ideas are extended logically, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes your main points. You have successfully balanced the two sides of the argument, demonstrating a clear understanding of the task requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the necessity of formal learning and the benefits of play is smooth. You use a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'However', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader through your argument. The paragraphing is appropriate, with each section serving a distinct purpose. The flow of information is natural, and there is no evidence of mechanical or repetitive use of linking words.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with precision. Phrases like 'unnecessary pressure', 'effectively through activities', and 'place too much emphasis' are used accurately. While the vocabulary is generally appropriate and natural, there is room to incorporate more sophisticated or less common lexical items to reach the highest band. The word choice is consistently clear, and there are no spelling or collocation errors that impede communication. The language used is well-suited to the academic nature of the task.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5
The essay displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. You use subordinate clauses effectively, such as in the sentence 'For example, children who develop strong reading skills at an early age are more likely to understand textbooks...'. The grammar is highly accurate, with very few errors. Punctuation is generally correct, although there is a minor spacing error in the final paragraph ('In conclusion,I'). Overall, the majority of your sentences are error-free, and the control over complex structures is consistent, which is a hallmark of a strong performance in this criterion.
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