Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays the criteria for learning is transforming day by day that people who used to grasp knowledge by the traditional manner is converting to advance level.

It's a considerable debate along the way from the old schools to modern school. I am partially agree that schools are focusing on the formal learning method than focusing on the knowledge with practical side.

On the one hand learning with traditional way helped students to understand the ethics and the decorum of the classroom. Traditional learning plays a significant role to develop a personality of a students. Individuals respect their teachers because there must be a borderline. For instance, student living in a classroom gain knowledge by sitting in a one room that enhance the basic ethics from the initial stage of the students.

On the other hand study with the practical experience helps to understand the practical procedure. Moreover, some subjects are practice demanding that they can not able to understand without doing a practical examples. For instance science subject demands a practical experience without that students can not understands the theory as well as the subject of physics demands a practical experience.

Similarly learning with different curricular activities helps to develop a confidence and a better understanding from the initial stage. Students are tend to do a physical activities and develop the better knowledge by doing a different physical activities. For instance children are keen to do an activities rather than a traditional learning way.

In conclusion, traditional way of learning is necessary thus it transforming to advance level of learning is necessary for the kids.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, acknowledging the debate on formal learning and discussing the importance of play. However, the development is somewhat superficial. While you mention the benefits of traditional learning (ethics, decorum) and practical learning (science, physics), the arguments lack depth and specific, well-explained examples. The position is clear, but the conclusion is slightly repetitive and does not fully synthesize the two sides of the argument. To improve, focus on expanding your reasoning with more detailed explanations of how play specifically enhances cognitive or social development in a primary school setting.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Moreover' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the connection between ideas is weak, such as the transition into the paragraph about curricular activities. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and some sentences feel disjointed. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will help achieve a higher band score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'good', 'different', and 'doing', and there are some awkward collocations, such as 'practice demanding' instead of 'practical in nature' or 'hands-on'. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'student living in a classroom' which is unclear. To improve, try to incorporate more academic collocations and precise terminology related to education and child development to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'people who used to grasp knowledge... is converting' (subject-verb agreement), 'I am partially agree' (incorrect verb form), and 'Students are tend to do' (incorrect passive construction). Additionally, there are issues with articles and pluralization, such as 'a physical activities'. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and consistent verb tense usage.

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