Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Many people believe that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal education, such as structured lessons and academic tests. I largely agree with this view because young children often suffer from stress and lose interest in studying when forced to sit for long periods. Furthermore, incorporating play into the classroom environment is essential for their overall development.
On the other hand, play should be considered an integral component of primary education rather than just a break between lessons. Educational games, hands-on activities, and group play allow children to understand complex concepts more naturally. For example, playing with blocks helps pupils grasp basic geometry and physics, while board games can improve basic numeracy and critical thinking skills.
In addition to supporting intellectual growth, play plays a crucial role in developing essential social and emotional skills. Through collaborative activities, children learn how to communicate, share, negotiate, and work as part of a team. It also allows them to express their creativity and reduce stress levels, making school a positive and safe environment.
In conclusion, I agree that primary schools spend too much time on formal, structured learning. Integrating structured play into everyday lessons is vital as it not only enhances academic understanding but also fosters necessary social skills and emotional well-being.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement and the importance of play. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement (210 words), which limits the depth of development. While the position is clear and supported by relevant examples like 'playing with blocks' and 'board games', the brevity prevents a more thorough exploration of the arguments. To reach a higher band, you must expand on your points with more detailed explanations or additional examples to meet the length requirement and fully develop your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use cohesive devices effectively, such as 'Furthermore', 'On the other hand', and 'In addition to', which help connect your arguments smoothly. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points. To improve, ensure that the transition between the two main body paragraphs is even more seamless to enhance the overall flow of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'integral component', 'collaborative activities', and 'academic understanding' accurately. The language is natural and appropriate for an academic essay. There are no significant errors in word choice or collocation that impede meaning. To move into the higher bands, try to incorporate more sophisticated or less common lexical items to express your ideas with greater precision and nuance, rather than relying on standard academic phrases.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Your control over grammar is generally strong, with few errors. For instance, sentences like 'Through collaborative activities, children learn how to communicate, share, negotiate, and work as part of a team' are well-constructed and error-free. Punctuation is used correctly throughout. To achieve a higher score, aim to include a wider variety of complex grammatical structures, such as conditional sentences or passive voice constructions, while maintaining the high level of accuracy you have already shown.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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