Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people believe that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal learning. I largely agree to this view because young children need time to develop social and creative skills, which cannot be gained through traditional lessons. Therefore play, should be part of primary education.

In many primary schools, children's spend several hours studying subjects such as mathematics, science, social and languages. Although these subjects are essential, excessive academic pressure can make young students stressed and also can reduce their interest in learning. At this age children are still developing their personality and communication skills. For instance, outdoor games and activities can teach them how to cooperate, solve problems and communicate with their classmates. At this age these skills are very crucial.

Play is extremely important in classroom like educational games can make students more enjoyable while helping them understand in difficult concepts. For instance, a teacher could use a counting game to teach basic mathematics or a role-play activity in improving language skills. ln addition, this favors them in developing creativity and imagination. However, this should not completely replace the formal education. Children still needs structural lessons in order to develop their reading, writing and mathematics.

In conclusion, I agree that primary schools can sometimes focus too heavily on formal learning. While academic subjects are necessary, children should also have sufficient opportunities to play, interact with others and develop their creativity. A balanced approach combining structured lessons with play would provide a more effective and enjoyable education for young children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear from the introduction and maintained throughout. Ideas are relevant, such as the mention of social skills and the use of educational games. However, the development is somewhat limited; for instance, the explanation of how play helps with 'difficult concepts' could be more deeply explored with a specific, detailed example. While the response covers all requirements, the depth of analysis is consistent with a Band 6.5 or 7.0 level, as some points are stated rather than fully extended.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices such as 'In many primary schools', 'For instance', 'In addition', and 'In conclusion' are used effectively to guide the reader. Paragraphing is appropriate, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the problem (excessive formal learning) to the solution (integrating play). Referencing is generally clear, though the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be slightly smoother to better connect the negative impact of pressure with the positive potential of play.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, with some attempts at less common items like 'excessive academic pressure' and 'structured lessons'. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'make students more enjoyable' (should be 'make learning more enjoyable') and 'this favors them in developing' (should be 'this aids them in developing'). The range is sufficient to convey meaning clearly, but it lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band score. Improving collocations would significantly enhance the quality of the writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'children's spend' (subject-verb agreement), 'play, should be' (unnecessary comma), and 'Children still needs' (subject-verb agreement). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. The control of punctuation is generally good, but the recurring subject-verb agreement issues suggest that the writer needs to focus on basic grammatical accuracy when using complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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