Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Most of the elementary schools are introducing new rules and regulation but some people are not in the favor of this change, but i believe that this is a positive change for schools, this will make students more oriented in their tasks and punctual in their attendance.

On the one hand, strict timings in primary schools is helping learners to get up early and do their breakfast, which enhances their metal health as well. This method should be adopted by every primary school to introduced more good students. Furthermore, having oriented routine daily with a unique uniform, language and food, students become more professional in life. this will help them in future. It improves their communications and presentations skills, allowing them to participate in multiple activities in their school.

On the other hand, by envolving children in small activities ,it boost the students mental and physical health too. Too much loading the students in primary classes continuosly have negative impacts on their learning speed and make them more anxious in class, however if various ways are adopted like engaging them with toys while teaching makes children more fresh and happy. When they are in good mood then they catches thing easily in class. This is makes peers more confident and intelligent.

In conclusion, focusing on formal learning shapes the student entirely helping his of her to be more confident in their tasks, i think this is positive change . Moreover, engaging them in other activities with study improves the student's learning cycle.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, though the development is somewhat uneven. You clearly state your position in favor of formal learning while acknowledging the importance of play. However, some arguments are underdeveloped; for instance, the link between 'unique uniform' and becoming 'professional' is not fully explained. The essay touches on the benefits of formal structure and the necessity of play, but the connection between these two ideas could be more cohesive. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is supported by a clear, logical explanation rather than just listing benefits.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use basic cohesive devices like 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion' to signal shifts in your argument. However, the flow within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the transition between sentences feels abrupt. For example, the jump from 'unique uniform' to 'communications and presentations skills' lacks a smooth logical bridge. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence builds logically upon the previous one will enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'elementary schools,' 'punctual,' and 'anxious.' However, there are several word choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'introduced more good students' (instead of 'produce well-rounded students') and 'catches thing easily' (instead of 'grasps concepts easily'). Some phrasing is repetitive, and the vocabulary lacks the precision required for higher bands. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and using more academic synonyms for basic verbs like 'make' or 'do'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('This is makes peers'), article usage ('do their breakfast'), and punctuation errors, such as missing spaces after commas or incorrect capitalization. While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors prevent the writing from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly with verb forms and pluralization, to ensure your complex sentences are error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.