Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people argue that primary schools give more attention to formal learning, which is slightly accurate specially nowadays.

In my point of view, learning in the past had advantages more than that in this period, because there was a balance between learning and leisure time, which is important at this stage for children to give them more confidence and would help them in the future to balance between their work and personal life.

The main reason for my opinion is that, in the past there was more tendency to give the child the ability to create more and enjoy his time, for example, playing sports at the break time. Even after school time there were many activities which helped them balance between their study and relaxing time. As a result, it provided them the space to discover new things, abilities, hobbies and even the aspects of their personality. In contrast, nowadays everything is fast and the creation of AI stimulates the competitive life pattern, which tends to multitasking personalities which directs educational institutions to formal learning while ignoring the children age and their shaping stage.

The first reason why I believe in children right to have their leisure time at this stage is that, this is the forming stage for their personality in which they can explore the surrounding world and develop communications with others.

The other reason is preparing them for the future and making balance between their jobs and their personal space. For instance, evidence confirms that people who have a balanced and tranquil childhood tends to create and improve faster.

In conclusion, I believe that everyone has the right to choose his life style specially the children because it is the transitional stage in their growth pattern, so every small steps will regulate and affect their ability and character by the way.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt, discussing both the extent of formal learning in primary schools and the importance of play alongside learning. The writer establishes a clear, consistent position from the introduction, arguing that modern education focuses too heavily on formal learning at the expense of childhood development. However, some ideas are repetitive and underdeveloped. For instance, the point about preparing children for future work-life balance is mentioned multiple times without being significantly extended. While the arguments are generally relevant, the support tends to rely on broad generalisations rather than specific, concrete examples. According to the Band 6 descriptors, the task is addressed with relevant ideas, but some areas lack full development.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement and follows a logical progression, moving from an introduction to body paragraphs discussing past versus present educational environments, and finally a conclusion. Paragraphing is used to separate main ideas, although some paragraphs are overly dense and contain multiple points. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'For example', 'In contrast', and 'The first reason why', but referencing is sometimes mechanical or confusing, as seen in phrases like 'by the way' at the end of the text. Furthermore, some transitional links feel forced. This aligns closely with the Band 6 descriptor where cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical and referencing is occasionally unclear.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'transitional stage', 'shaping stage', and 'tranquil childhood'. However, there are noticeable word-choice and collocation inaccuracies throughout the text, such as 'learning in the past had advantages more than that in this period' instead of 'outweighed those of today', and 'competitive life pattern'. Spelling is generally accurate, but limitations in precision and lexical control restrict the score. The vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey meaning, fitting the Band 6 criteria where the range is sufficient for the task despite some errors and awkward phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses and conditional structures. However, grammatical control is inconsistent. There are several structural errors and awkward agreements, such as 'people who have a balanced and tranquil childhood tends' (should be 'tend') and 'everyone has the right to choose his life style specially the children' (run-on/punctuation issue). Punctuation is occasionally weak, and minor slip-ups occur in preposition use, such as 'at the break time' instead of 'during break time'. Despite these errors, the meaning is rarely impeded, matching the Band 6 descriptor which notes a mix of structures and some grammar errors that rarely block communication.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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