Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In an era characterised by rapid social and technological change, education system is a matter of concern in contemporary society. Education is obligatory for every individual, some people argue that primary schools focus on more on learning. However, i believe that children should get education with play so then will not feel bored.

Some individuals believe that schools are mainly focusing on formal learning, which is essential for every learner. Education provides a sense of awareness and knowledge about the world. Numerous schools are following a certain pattern of curriculum which they teach every year. Enlisted courses are mandatory for every student and exams are conducted to evaluate students. Which is a good approach to set a routine for a child, therefore they are able to learn and prosper discipline.

However, on the other hand it is stated that students should have an opportunity to play with studies, therefore they do not get bored and exuasted. For a primary school kid it is important to study as well as play, because small minds are not that much mature to handle all the knowledge, they need activities from which they can gain enjoyment as well as learning.

In my opinion, I believe that kids should have a play along with study because education is mandatory and key steps for their future. Schools should introduce activity based learning from which students are able to learn with play. Furthermore, play time should be mandatory for primary kids so they do not feel exuasted and dumb.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, acknowledging the focus on formal learning in primary schools and discussing the importance of play alongside study. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. The position is stated, such as "i believe that children should get education with play so then will not feel bored," but the supporting arguments lack depth and clear examples. While the student touches on the benefits of routine and the need for young minds to enjoy learning, these points are not fully extended. For instance, the discussion on curriculum and discipline is brief. Consequently, the response aligns best with a Band 5.0, as it addresses the task partially and relies on somewhat underdeveloped ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays some organizational structure with distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs addressing different angles, and a conclusion. However, the overall progression is occasionally hindered by abrupt transitions and mechanical cohesive devices, such as "Furthermore" and repetitive use of "however." Referencing is sometimes unclear, for example, "Which is a good approach to set a routine for a child," where the relative pronoun "which" is used to start a sentence and refer to the preceding idea without proper connection. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of ideas lacks smooth flow. These features place the response firmly in the Band 5.0 range for coherence and cohesion due to inadequate and repetitive cohesive devices.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses a limited but minimally adequate range of vocabulary for the task, with terms like "contemporary society," "obligatory," "curriculum," and "routine." However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors that detract from the writing, such as "education system" missing an article, "focus on more on learning," "exuasted" instead of exhausted, and "dumb," which is an inappropriate and overly informal collocation in this academic context. Less common vocabulary is attempted but frequently inaccurate, causing some difficulty or awkwardness for the reader. Therefore, the lexical resource is characteristic of a Band 5.0, featuring a restricted range and recurrent errors in spelling and word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writing exhibits a mixed control of grammatical structures, combining simple sentences with occasional attempts at complex forms. However, these complex attempts are frequently faulty. Examples include fragment sentences like "Which is a good approach to set a routine for a child, therefore they are able to learn and prosper discipline," and missing subject-verb agreement or articles, such as "education system is a matter" and "small minds are not that much mature." Punctuation errors also occur, such as lowercase "i" used as a pronoun in "i believe." Frequent grammatical errors cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the text from reaching a higher band, placing it at a Band 5.0.

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