Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.5)
Some people believe that primary schools place excessive emphasis on formal academic learning. I largely agree with this view because young children can become stressed when they are expected to spend most of their school time on traditional subjects. However, I believe that learning through play is equally important and should be an integral part of primary education.
There is no doubt that formal education is necessary for children at the primary level. Schools need to provide students with fundamental skills such as reading, writing and mathematics, which form the basis of their future education. Nevertheless, an excessive focus on academic achievement can have several disadvantages. Young children have relatively short attention spans, and requiring them to sit still and complete academic tasks for long periods may reduce their interest in learning. Furthermore, too much emphasis on examinations and grades can create unnecessary pressure and prevent children from developing other important abilities, such as communication, creativity and problem-solving.
For this reason, play should have a significant role in the primary classroom. Play-based activities can make lessons more enjoyable while allowing children to learn naturally. For example, mathematical concepts can be taught through games involving counting, shapes or simple calculations, while language skills can be developed through storytelling and role-play. Such activities not only reinforce academic knowledge but also encourage children to cooperate with their classmates, express their ideas and develop confidence. In addition, physical games can improve children's health and teach them valuable qualities such as teamwork and discipline.
In conclusion, although formal learning is essential in primary schools, I agree that an excessive concentration on it can be counterproductive. Children should be given regular opportunities to learn through play because this approach can support their academic development while also improving their social, creative and physical skills. Therefore, the ideal primary classroom should achieve a healthy balance between structured learning and play.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 8.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.5 |
| Overall | 7.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5
The response fully addresses all parts of the two-part prompt. The student clearly states their position on formal learning in primary schools in the introduction and maintains it throughout the essay. They explore both the necessity of fundamental skills and the drawbacks of excessive academic focus, while also devoting a well-supported paragraph to the importance of learning through play. Ideas are well developed with relevant examples, such as teaching mathematical concepts through games involving counting and shapes, which demonstrates a thorough understanding of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.0
Ideas are logically sequenced and progress naturally from the introduction to the discussion of formal education, the benefits of play, and a balanced conclusion. Cohesive devices are managed well without being intrusive, using linking words such as 'Nevertheless', 'Furthermore', and 'For this reason' appropriately. Paragraphing is used sufficiently, with each paragraph focusing on a clear central topic. The overall structure is clear, demonstrating skilful management of organizational features.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The student uses a sufficient range of vocabulary with good flexibility and precision, suitable for an academic response. Less common items and collocations are used effectively throughout the text, such as 'excessive emphasis', 'fundamental skills', 'counterproductive', and 'structured learning'. Word choice is generally natural and accurate, with no noticeable errors that impede communication. The lexical control displayed aligns comfortably with the band 7 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5
The essay demonstrates a good variety of complex sentence structures, including conditional and subordinate clauses (e.g., 'Young children have relatively short attention spans, and requiring them to sit still... may reduce their interest'). The majority of sentences are error-free, with very occasional minor slips or inappropriacies. Control of grammar and punctuation is strong throughout, allowing the reader to follow the arguments smoothly without any difficulty.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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