Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Primary schools are where children are made of learn various things that include physical activites and theory related subjects. Nowadays, educating childern has become a keen role and since the age of 4 to 5 people sent their childern to school so that they can learn many formal things so that if can help them improve in future.

On the one hand, schools are developed for childern to learn and improve there skills so that it can help them in future. Every school has different ways of teachings and following rules and regulation where students are required to follow. Like of an example, students in primary schools should learn to wear a proper uniform and maintain disipline or else they can be punished and students tend to break rules because there can be concequences. There are also physical activities done which helps students to improve mental health and physical health, and help them focus on studies also.

On the other hand, by providing stricts rule and focusing too much on formal learning can create stress for children. Students would have lack of interest in learning and attending classes. Some students might not be able to follow the rules and can have bad impression in classroom. Like for an example, if students are given too much of homwework that has to be submitted tomorrow can be stressful beacause they can be punished if there work is not completed and miss there classes.

In conclusion, schools should provide formal learning as it can help them focus and follow the rule and prevent them from getting distracted. However, if they focus too much on formal learning it can make student create lack of interest and not able to follow the rule. There should also be physiacl activities or more of practical work so that it can help student follow and understand concepts more easy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt, discussing both the extent of formal learning and the importance of play alongside learning. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas is limited and sometimes repetitive, which places the response in Band 6. For instance, the discussion on rules and discipline in the second paragraph is somewhat circular and lacks fully articulated examples. While the student attempts to provide examples such as wearing uniforms or homework constraints, these ideas remain under-developed and lack the depth expected at higher bands. The conclusion successfully reiterates the main arguments, contributing to a coherent overall response that addresses the core task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a recognisable introduction, body paragraphs addressing opposing views, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different arguments, such as the benefits of formal structure versus its potential to cause stress. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. The student relies on repetitive transition phrases like 'Like for an example' and struggles with referencing, leading to occasional ambiguity. For example, in the third paragraph, pronouns like 'they' and 'their' are sometimes confusingly attributed. Furthermore, logical progression between sentences occasionally falters due to abrupt shifts in thought. Consequently, the performance aligns best with the Band 5 descriptors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating everyday ideas related to schooling, discipline, and stress. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text that draw the reader's attention. Examples include 'activites', 'childern', 'stricts', 'homwework', and 'physiacl'. Additionally, the student repeatedly uses basic lexical items such as 'learn', 'rules', and 'help' without demonstrating flexibility or precision. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the intended meaning, the frequency of spelling mistakes and the lack of less common lexical items prevent the response from achieving a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing dependent clauses and conditional structures such as 'if students are given too much of homework that has to be submitted tomorrow can be stressful'. However, these complex structures are frequently faulty, leading to grammatical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing. There are persistent errors in subject-verb agreement ('people sent their childern', 'strict rule and focusing... can create'), punctuation, and article usage. While these errors do not completely impede communication and the reader can generally follow the argument, the high frequency of structural slips places this performance firmly at Band 5.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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