Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Some people believe that primary school puts more attention on formal learning. I firmly agree on this view and children should have a combined learning and playing environment in their classrooms at primary school.
One reason I agree that primary schools focus too much on formal learning is that excessive academic work can make children feel pressured and reduce their motivation to learn. Young children generally have shorter attention spans, so spending long periods completing worksheets, reading textbooks or preparing for tests can cause boredom and make them less interested in education. For example, a primary school student who spends most of the school day doing written exercises may become tired and lose concentration during lessons. This resulting in children losing interest from education as they find in as a burden instead of learning experience.
However, I believe that combining play with learning is particularly important because it allows children to develop social and practical skills. Through games and interactive activities, children can learn how to communicate, cooperate with others and solve problems while still gaining academic knowledge. For instance, a teacher could use a group-based mathematics game to help students practice basic calculations while also encouraging them to work together. Therefore, learning which is collaborated with playing in classroom would have positive impact on children.
In conclusion, I agree that primary schools can place too much emphasis on formal learning, as excessive academic work may reduce children's motivation. Therefore, schools should combine academic lessons with play to make learning more enjoyable and support children's wider development.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The candidate successfully addresses all parts of the two-part prompt. The writer clearly states a position in the introduction agreeing that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and extends this argument by addressing the importance of play in the classroom in both body paragraphs. Ideas are generally well-supported with relevant examples, such as the mention of shorter attention spans and group-based mathematics games. However, some arguments lack deeper extension, which keeps the response at a Band 7 level. The progression of ideas is logical, and the writer fully engages with both the extent of agreement and the importance of play.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The response is logically organised, with a clear overall progression from introduction to body paragraphs and conclusion. Each paragraph has a clear central topic. Cohesive devices such as 'One reason', 'However', 'For example', and 'Therefore' are used to connect ideas, though some transitional phrasing feels slightly mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct arguments about academic pressure and play-based learning. Referencing is generally clear, though minor infelicities in logical transitions prevent the text from reaching a higher band score.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is generally adequate and appropriate for the task, demonstrating a sufficient range to discuss education and child development. The writer attempts some less common lexical items such as 'excessive academic work', 'attention spans', and 'interactive activities'. However, there are some noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'This resulting in children losing interest from education' and 'finding in as a burden'. These minor errors do not impede communication, but they reflect a Band 6 level of lexical control rather than the precision required for a Band 7.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating a reasonable command of grammar. Examples of complex structures include relative clauses and conditional-style reasoning, such as 'a primary school student who spends most of the school day doing written exercises may become tired'. However, there are grammatical errors that slightly disrupt fluency, most notably 'This resulting in children losing interest' (fragment/tense error) and 'learning which is collaborated with playing in classroom' (awkward passive voice and missing article). Despite these occasional errors, communication is not impeded, supporting a solid Band 6 performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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