Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Some people have raised concerns that primary educational institutions give more attention on academic knowledge of students, instead of focusing on their physical activities. Although, formal education lays down the foundation for the student's educational as well as career development, it is also necessary for children to play for some time. In my perspective, focusing on formal education of children in their primary schools is more necessary, and I totally agree with this point of view.
The primary schools prefer academic knowledge of students to their co-curriculum activities. Childhood education is very crucial for students noy only to improve their academic performance but also help them to improve their career prospects. For instance, many students are not able to improve their academic performance in their high schools because of the lack of quality education in their childhood. The students which are provided with formal education in their primary schools improve their academic score at a very fast rate. Therefore, formal education plays an important role in improving academic achievement of children.
However, in primary schools, it is also necessary to consider the extra-curricular activities alongside with formal education. Children should be motivated to indulge in many co-curricular activities. For instance, performing on stage, acting, singing, playing different sports, and taking part in speeches, develop the personality of students. For all these reasons, such kind of activities should also be considered besides education. All in all, taking part in different kinds of sport competitions are as essential as formal education of students.
To sum up, strong educational background in childhood helps students to step ahead in their educational as well as career improvement, but the co-curricular activities should also be encouraged in their childhood.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing the focus on formal learning in primary schools and the importance of play. The writer takes a clear position, stating that formal education is more necessary. However, the development of ideas lacks depth and nuance. For instance, the argument in the second paragraph relies on repetitive points about academic performance without fully exploring why formal learning should take precedence over play. While the main parts of the prompt are covered, the support remains somewhat limited and generalised, aligning best with the Band 6 descriptors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is coherent overall with a clear introduction and conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different arguments, such as focusing on academic knowledge in paragraph two and extra-curricular activities in paragraph three. However, some cohesive devices feel mechanical or slightly awkward, such as starting paragraphs with 'The primary schools prefer...' or 'However, in primary schools...'. Additionally, referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as using 'such kind of activities' rather than a smoother demonstrative. Progression is generally logical, but transitions between ideas could be more natural to reach a higher band.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student displays an adequate vocabulary range for the task, attempting some less common collocations and phrases such as 'educational institutions', 'career prospects', and 'extra-curricular activities'. However, there are notable lexical errors and awkward phrasings, such as 'give more attention on' instead of 'give more attention to', 'co-curriculum activities' instead of 'co-curricular activities', and 'noy only' (a typo). Words like 'crucial' and 'essential' are used appropriately, but overall word choice and collocation inaccuracies prevent the lexical score from reaching Band 7.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including conditional and subordinate clauses (e.g., 'Although, formal education lays down the foundation...'). However, there are several grammatical errors and punctuation slips throughout the text. Examples include the unnecessary comma after 'Although', preposition errors ('attention on' instead of 'attention to'), and subject-verb agreement issues ('The students which are provided' where 'who' is required and 'score' should be pluralised). These errors do not impede communication, but they occur frequently enough to typify the Band 6 descriptor.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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