Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is often argued that primary schools focus much on formal learning and that children should be given more opportunities to play and learn though activities. I strongly agree with this view, as I believe that although formal education is essential, play is equally important for children's overall development.

On the one hand, formal learning plays an important role in primary education. Firstly, basic reading, writing and mathematics skills develop in early age is play crucial role in children's life .this is enables children to improve their concentration and confidence level. These skills provide them strong academic foundation and help them cope with more advanced subjects in the future. However placing excessive pressure on young children to study can lead to stress and boredom. Therefore, academic lessons should be appropriate for their age rather than being overly demanding.

On the other hand, I believe that play is equally important for children's overall development. Through the games and interactive activities, children can develop important skills such as teamwork, communication and problem-solving. For instance, group games can teach children how to cooperate with others, while puzzlees and creative activities can encourage critical thinking and imagination. In addition outdoor activities contribute to children's physical development and help them remain active and healthy. As a result, play can make learning more enjoyable while supporting children's social, mental and physical development.

In conclusion, although formal learning is necessary for building a strong academic foundation, I believe that play should also be given considerable approach combination of academic lessons with play can children develop academically, socially and physically.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The student addresses all parts of the prompt by stating a clear position of agreement in the introduction and discussing both the value of formal learning and the necessity of play. The ideas are generally relevant and extended appropriately, such as when discussing the social, mental, and physical benefits of group games and outdoor activities in the third paragraph. However, some arguments in the body paragraphs, particularly regarding basic skills developing at an 'early age', suffer from slight under-development and expression issues. The overall position is maintained throughout, satisfying the requirements for Band 6.5 to 7.0. Because the ideas are well supported with appropriate examples, a score of 6.5 is appropriate.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a clear logical organization with an introduction, two distinct body paragraphs representing 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' views, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'However', 'In addition', and 'As a result' are used to guide the reader through the text, although some mechanical usage is present. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately to separate the contrasting viewpoints. However, referencing and transitional flow are occasionally clunky, as seen in the final sentence of the conclusion where missing prepositions interrupt the progression. Overall, the essay is coherent and easy to follow, aligning closely with the Band 6.5 descriptors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'overall development', 'academic foundation', 'interactive activities', and 'critical thinking'. There are, however, noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'focus much on' instead of 'focus too much on', 'skills develop in early age is play crucial role', and 'considerable approach combination'. Furthermore, there is a minor spelling slip ('puzzlees'). While these errors do not impede overall communication, they prevent the lexical score from reaching the higher band levels. Therefore, a score of 6.0 reflects the sufficient yet flawed vocabulary use.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay incorporates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some variety in structure. For instance, the writer successfully employs conditional and relative clauses, such as 'while group games can teach children how to cooperate with others'. Nevertheless, there are frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasings throughout the text, including 'skills develop in early age is play crucial role', 'this is enables children', and the grammatical breakdown in the concluding sentence ('combination of academic lessons with play can children develop'). These errors occasionally cause strain or require the reader to re-read, keeping the performance firmly within the Band 6 range.

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