Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

I agree with that primary schools only focus too much on formal learning instead of children enjoyment or play. My opinion is that children can learn more from physical activity as compare to traditional leaning methods. Childerns are more active energentics and smart they get bore in lectures easily for them physical activities and games are very iportant these kin d of activities make them active. For Example when i was child i get bored in the classroom and not able learn anything but yes i really enjoy the sport class and science class because they teach us in a intertesting way we played and we studied both together.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response suffers from a critical length penalty, containing only 109 words against the required 250-word minimum. Because of this severe under-length, the task cannot be fully addressed or developed, capping the score at Band 4.0. While the student does manage to express an opinion agreeing that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, the ideas are extremely limited and under-developed. There is a brief attempt to provide a personal example, but overall, the response remains a single, short paragraph that fails to explore both parts of the prompt in sufficient depth. To improve, the student must write extensively, ensuring both parts of the question (the extent of agreement and the importance of play) are fully discussed with supporting examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The text consists of a single paragraph, completely lacking appropriate paragraphing to structure the introduction, body arguments, and conclusion. Cohesion is faulty and mechanical. The student relies on basic conjunctions and transitions, leading to run-on sentences that lack proper punctuation (e.g., 'Childerns are more active energentics and smart they get bore in lectures easily'). There is no clear overall progression of ideas, as thoughts are jumbled together without adequate signposting or logical sequencing. To achieve a higher band, the text needs to be divided into distinct paragraphs, with cohesive devices used more naturally and effectively to guide the reader through the arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, struggling to meet the minimum requirements of the task. There are numerous spelling errors ('energentics', 'Childerns', 'iportant', 'kin d', 'intertesting') and incorrect word forms. The range of vocabulary is limited, relying heavily on everyday words like 'big', 'play', and 'learn' without demonstrating the ability to use less common lexical items accurately. Collocations are also weak (e.g., 'sport class' instead of 'Physical Education'). To improve, the student needs to expand their working vocabulary, pay closer attention to spelling and word forms, and attempt more precise academic phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammatical range is extremely limited, consisting mostly of simple and attempted complex sentences that are marred by frequent errors. Punctuation is largely absent, leading to run-on sentences and comma splices (e.g., 'My opinion is that children can learn more from physical activity as compare to traditional leaning methods. Childerns are more active energentics and smart they get bore...'). Subject-verb agreement issues and tense inconsistencies also appear frequently ('when i was child i get bored'). These grammatical breakdowns can cause difficulty and strain for the reader. To improve, the student must focus on sentence boundaries, accurate verb tenses, and mastering basic clause structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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