Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, the majority of the school education system is changing considerably. Some individuals argue that primary schools highly focus on formal education. I firmly believe that fun and learn are both important in studies. The essay will discuss both the points about education system and playing.

On the one hand, people often argue about primary education system fosters formal learning rather than playing at school, because schools want a better grade by every child owing to uplift the reputation of the school across the state. It tends to decrease in cognitive thinking of the student as a result, the child will not engage in physical activities like sports and dance. Moreover, many of the parents think education alone is the great key of success and forced to their child for study. Eventually, child is afraid of their parents and unable to participate in other activities.

On the other hand, physical activities play a vital role in child's overall growth. Education minister should take initiative about implement sports in a school's curriculum activities for students' development. For example, in every school there should be some lectures about leisure activities and sports therefore, children can chance to grow in a sports field. In addition, school will also gain popularity if the student will play game at national level in future it represents the nation as well as school.

In conclusion, although the education is crucial, having leisure activities at school fosters children ability to think as well increases the competition among the students. I agree that fun and learn both should be prioritized equally.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The candidate addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the focus on formal learning and the importance of play in primary schools. A clear position is presented, stating that fun and learning should both be prioritized equally. However, some ideas are underdeveloped or lack depth, such as the generalized assertion that parental pressure makes children afraid. Examples provided are somewhat generic and lack specific support. While the task is adequately addressed, the arguments would benefit from greater elaboration and more precise examples to reach a higher band level.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear four-paragraph structure comprising an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. Cohesive devices are employed, such as On the one hand, On the other hand, and In conclusion, which help to guide the reader through the text. However, referencing and transitions are sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, as seen in phrases like 'the essay will discuss both the points about education system and playing'. Logical progression is maintained throughout, though minor disruptions occur due to phrasing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The candidate demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'cognitive thinking', 'leisure activities', and 'overall growth'. However, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word formation throughout the text. Examples include 'fun and learn are both important' (should be 'learning'), 'education system fosters formal learning rather than playing' (misuse of 'fosters'), and 'education alone is the great key of success and forced to their child for study'. These errors do not impede overall communication, but they restrict the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, attempting complex forms such as 'Some individuals argue that primary schools highly focus on formal education'. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and awkward structures, particularly with verb forms, prepositions, and articles, such as 'education minister should take initiative about implement sports', 'child is afraid', and 'children can chance to grow'. Punctuation is generally acceptable, and while errors are frequent, they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended message despite the flaws.

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