Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
A section of people debate that elementary schools devotes more concentration on the formal way of education as opposed to a system that gives equal priority to playing along with formal learning. I believe that children should be allowed to be themselves and engage in both playing and learning for their holistic development.
It is essential for primary schools to have a balanced view on learning and playing. From a biological point of view, children were never meant to be caged inside a room the entire day, rather they should be allowed to explore. Playing with their friends will instill skills like confidence, team work, communication skills, etc. Children primarly makes friends through playing and good friends are essential for a child's mental wellbeing.
Playing different types of games help a child to develop atheletism and affinity towards sports.Playing will force a child to be in constant movement which is needed for the overall health and bodily growth. It will help them to avoid getting lifestyle diseases like obesity, myopia, etc. Children playing with one other also helps to boost their seratonine and other hormonal levels that will lead them to a happier, healthier life. While playing they may injure or bruise themselves but studies have shown that this will help in maturing their immunity levels.
Different kinds of learning can be intergrated with playing. This hybrid way of teaching can help build concentration and build a penchant for learning formal subjects as well. For instance, children can be taught multiplication table by having to collect sticks or stones corresponding to the a number.
In conclusion, I am of the opinion that children should engage in studies and playing, giving equal importance to both for building a new generation who is equipped with all necessary skills.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the student discusses the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and explains the importance of play in the primary classroom. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. Ideas are extended with relevant explanations, such as the biological necessity of movement, the development of social skills, and the integration of play with academic concepts like multiplication. For instance, the example of having children collect sticks or stones to learn tables successfully illustrates hybrid teaching. However, some arguments, such as the mention of immunity levels and hormonal changes, feel slightly underdeveloped or tangential, preventing the essay from reaching a higher band. Overall, all parts of the task are addressed adequately with a clear, supported position, meeting the descriptors for a Band 6.5 or solid 6.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a logical progression of ideas from introduction to conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with distinct paragraphs dedicated to the introduction, social benefits, physical/health benefits, integrated learning, and the conclusion. Cohesive devices are generally present, such as 'From a biological point of view,' 'While playing,' and 'In conclusion.' However, some cohesion is a bit mechanical or repetitive, and referencing is occasionally faulty, such as 'corresponding to the a number.' Furthermore, transitional links between sentences could be smoother to avoid abrupt shifts in topics. Despite these minor lapses, the logical flow is clear enough to satisfy the criteria for a Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common phrases such as 'holistic development,' 'lifestyle diseases,' and 'hybrid way of teaching.' However, there are notable word-choice and spelling errors that occasionally detract from precision. For example, 'devotes more concentration' is less natural than 'focuses more attention,' 'primarly' contains a spelling error, 'atheletism' is misspelled, and 'seratonine' is misspelled. Additionally, 'intergrated' contains a typo. Despite these inaccuracies, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning without impeding overall communication, which aligns well with the Band 6 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conditional/participial structures (e.g., 'Children playing with one other also helps to boost...'). However, there are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'elementary schools devotes' instead of 'devote' and 'Children primarly makes' instead of 'make.' There are also prepositional and article inaccuracies, such as 'corresponding to the a number.' While these errors are noticeable and require the reader to occasionally adjust, they rarely impede overall communication, placing the grammatical performance firmly at Band 6.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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