Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Some people believe that primary schools place excessive emphasis on formal academic learning at the expense of children's broader development. I largely agree with this view because, although foundational academic skills are essential, an overly academic approach can place unnecessary pressure on young children and restrict opportunities for social, emotional and creative development. In my view, play should be an integral part of primary education rather than being regarded as a distraction from learning.

There is no doubt that formal learning plays an important role in the primary years. Children need structured instruction to develop fundamental abilities in reading, writing and mathematics, which provide the foundation for subsequent education. Teachers also need to establish clear learning objectives and assess pupils' progress systematically. Without sufficient academic structure, some children may fail to acquire essential skills and could experience difficulties in later stages of their education. Therefore, the problem is not formal learning itself, but the possibility that it may become disproportionately dominant.

An excessive focus on formal instruction, however, can have several negative consequences. Young children generally have relatively short attention spans and learn differently from older students. Requiring them to spend long periods completing worksheets, memorising information or preparing for tests may reduce their motivation and make learning feel like an obligation rather than an enjoyable process. Moreover, an overly academic environment may leave insufficient time for developing creativity, communication, emotional intelligence and cooperation. These abilities are difficult to cultivate through conventional classroom exercises alone, yet they are crucial to children's long-term personal and social development.

For this reason, play is extremely important in primary education and should be incorporated purposefully into classroom learning. Play allows children to explore ideas, experiment, solve problems and interact with their peers in a relatively relaxed environment. Educational games, role-play, storytelling, puzzles and collaborative activities can reinforce academic concepts while simultaneously developing social and cognitive skills. For example, a teacher could use a classroom shop to teach children basic addition, subtraction and money management. Rather than simply completing mathematical exercises, pupils would apply these concepts in a meaningful and enjoyable situation.

Play is also valuable for children's emotional and social development. Through group games, children learn to share, negotiate, follow rules, resolve disagreements and appreciate different perspectives. Creative play can additionally encourage imagination and self-expression, helping pupils develop confidence and independence. In this sense, play should not be viewed as the opposite of learning; when carefully designed, it is itself a powerful form of learning.

In conclusion, I agree to a large extent that primary schools can place too much emphasis on formal academic learning. While structured teaching is necessary for developing essential literacy and numeracy skills, it should be balanced with opportunities for meaningful play. A well-designed primary classroom should therefore combine academic instruction with play-based and collaborative activities, allowing children to develop intellectually, socially, emotionally and creatively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response fully addresses all parts of the task by clearly stating a position on formal learning and explaining why play is important in primary education. The writer successfully balances both sides of the argument. In the second paragraph, the necessity of foundational academic skills is acknowledged, while the third and fourth paragraphs effectively develop ideas regarding the negative consequences of excessive formal instruction and the benefits of play. The arguments are well supported with relevant explanations and a practical classroom example of a shop teaching basic mathematics. The position is maintained logically and consistently throughout the essay, demonstrating a high level of task fulfillment. Therefore, the response aligns closely with the Band 8 descriptor for this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay displays clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct central topic, starting with an introductory overview, moving through the merits of formal learning, the drawbacks of excessive academic pressure, the benefits of play, and a concise conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'There is no doubt that', 'An excessive focus', 'For this reason', and 'In conclusion' are used effectively and flexibly without being intrusive. Paragraphing is managed skilfully, ensuring a smooth transition between contrasting ideas. Referencing and substitution are handled accurately, making the relationships between sentences explicit and easy to follow. This demonstrates strong control over cohesion, warranting a Band 8 score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The student demonstrates a wide, fluent, and flexible lexical resource suitable for an academic essay. Less common and precise vocabulary items are used skilfully throughout the text, such as 'disproportionately dominant', 'cognitive skills', 'self-expression', and 'interact with their peers'. Word choice and collocations are generally natural and accurate, with phrases like 'foundational academic skills', 'unnecessary pressure', and 'meaningful and enjoyable situation' used appropriately. There are only occasional minor inaccuracies, but these do not impede communication. The control of vocabulary reflects the Band 7.5 descriptor, comfortably earning a Band 7.5 score rounded up or maintained securely at Band 7.0 for minor slips, but given the range and precision, a solid Band 7 is well-deserved.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The writer uses a wide variety of complex sentence structures with a high degree of flexibility and accuracy. Examples include concessive clauses ('although foundational academic skills are essential, an overly academic approach can...') and conditional/participial structures ('Rather than simply completing mathematical exercises, pupils would apply these concepts...'). The majority of sentences in the response are entirely error-free, and grammar and punctuation are controlled very well. Only occasional minor inappropriacies occur, which never impede the reader's understanding. The strong control of complex grammar across a lengthy response clearly meets the criteria for a Band 8.

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