Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many people argue that elementary schools mostly emphasizes on structured learning. I totally agree with the statement due to the fact that children become more analogous and do not develop independent thinking of their own. I do believe that playing outside study hours is advantageous as it allows them to develop communication skills and teamwork.

For children stuck on strict environment, they are not able to comprehend to work on their own due to being stuck in a structural cage where they are programmed to perform one step after another without asking any questions. This type of behavior teaches the children to follow the crowd rather than to lead it which is not the ideal mindset to develop for youngsters because they are the pillars for the future. For example, children praised when they get high grades at school typically believe that having higher grade is what defines being an ideal student and may look down upon their colleagues just for having a decent grade.

Performing extra activities while they are not focused on books is crucial for younger students as they are able to learn new things which are not taught by the school. Communication skills and working with others are essential, as these types of skills are required in life. As they grow up they will come across different kinds of people and might have to work with them. If they are simply taught in a fixed learning environment to do what they are told they might not be able to experience such things in life. For instance, children who played competitive sports in school are able to perform well performing with a group of unknown people compared to those who didn't play outside their study hours.

In conclusion, I believe primary schools focusing more on formal learning is not beneficial for young children as it develops a type of herd mentality and behavior like that of a clock. Allowing them to play outside learning hours is important because it allows them to develop new skills which are required in the future

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt, expressing a clear position on the excessive focus on formal learning in primary schools and the importance of play. The ideas are extended, though some points tend to over-generalise, such as claiming that structured environments cause children to become entirely 'programmed' like a clock. However, the student supports their viewpoint with relevant, albeit slightly hyperbolic, arguments and examples regarding teamwork and communication. To move into the higher bands, the arguments should be supported with more nuanced and balanced examples rather than extreme generalisations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organised with a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing each part of the prompt, and a concise conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'For example' and 'In conclusion', though referencing is occasionally imprecise, like 'such things in life'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas about formal learning versus play activities. Overall progression is clear, though some transitional phrasing feels slightly mechanical, placing this firmly in the Band 6.5 to 7 range. Strengthening paragraph-to-paragraph links would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student attempts a range of vocabulary with mixed success. There are some appropriate items and collocations such as 'independent thinking', 'communication skills', and 'herd mentality'. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'elementary schools mostly emphasizes on' (incorrect verb form and preposition), 'become more analogous' (misused word), and 'stuck on strict environment' (preposition error). Less common vocabulary is attempted but lacks precision. Spelling is generally accurate, but lexical control needs tightening to reach a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including conditional and relative clauses (e.g., 'If they are simply taught... they might not be able to...'). However, grammatical errors are frequent throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('schools mostly emphasizes'), missing prepositions ('children praised when they get'), and awkward phrasings like 'perform well performing'. While these errors rarely completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent the response from achieving a Band 7.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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