Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There is an ongoing debate about whether primary schools focus on formal learning more than the necessary. I agree with this statement and I think young children who practice playful learning tend to develop more practical skills.

Some primary schools prefer to teach children mostly inside a classroom. That might be detrimental to the learning process because people have different ways to learn. Some kids might find it difficult to learn the formal away in the first couple of years, and schools should understand their needs while working around it. For example, some young kids have difficulty paying attention for a long period of time. Therefore, the formal learning system might make it harder for them to concentrate on the lessions. Schools should take this into consideration and mix a formal and playful way to teach to include everyone.

Another point to considerate is that young children usually understand better playful learning. This is because they are not used to stay in a classroom, neither at home or at childhood centres. Changing the environment drastically might affect their learning process. Children usually observe and reproduce comportaments from what is happening around them. They might, for example, easily learn about number when they can experiment counting their own toys. Therefore, I believe it is vital for young children to play as well as learn during primary school.

In conclusion, using the formal learning system for young children might be detrimental for their overall development, because they are more likely to learn better in a system where they can play while developing their skills.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, expressing a clear position that primary schools focus too much on formal learning and explaining why play is important for young children. Ideas are supported with relevant explanations, such as the developmental difficulties children face when adjusting to a strict classroom environment and how physical experimentation aids understanding, as seen in "learn about number when they can experiment counting their own toys." However, some ideas remain slightly underdeveloped or rely on generalisations rather than deeper elaboration. Overall, the response meets the requirements of Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas, such as classroom adjustment issues versus cognitive benefits of play. Cohesive devices are employed, including transition words like "For example," "Therefore," and "In conclusion." However, referencing and transitions are at times slightly repetitive or mechanical, which keeps the response at a Band 6.0 level.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating the writer's opinions. There are several inappropriate word choices and non-standard collocations, such as "formal away" instead of "formal way," "lessions" instead of "lessons," and "comportaments" instead of "behaviors" or "actions." The student also writes "stay in a classroom, neither at home or at childhood centres," which contains a referencing error. These errors do not impede communication, placing the lexical control solidly at Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including conditional-style clauses and relative clauses such as "children who practice playful learning" and "where they can play while developing their skills." There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing choices throughout the text, including "focus on formal learning more than the necessary," "used to stay," and "understand better playful learning." Punctuation is generally fine, and meaning remains clear despite the errors, justifying a Band 6.0 score.

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