Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

School is first place where children can learn something new. Nevertheless, some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. I largely believe that schools need to focus in play as well as learn.

In schools teachers only focus on their academy. They are reached student very well about thing which is related to books. By this kind of teaching methods students are able in the study. They properly know about their syllabus which can help in their exams. Childrens are able in study thing such as quiz, speech and many more. By teaching formal on the schools they are able to well communicate to other people. They also know about different language and cultures.

Learning is very crucial for children however, they also need some extra activities such as play. Play games make childrens more fit and fresh and they do their homework so conveniently. By only learning about student childrens feel quite bored and they feel pressure also. To reduce academic pressure teachers should add extra activities also in primary schools. May be play games is childrens most liked hobbies so children want to play from their young age. So, it need in primary school. Some Childrens want make their Carrier by play games.

In conclusion, primary schools also need some extra learning not only formal learning. Formal learning can give children many advantages although, it have more disadvantages. In my opinion it is very vital to children focus in their study as well as in some extra activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, expressing an opinion on formal learning and discussing the importance of play in primary schools. A position is presented, stating that schools need to focus on play as well as learning. However, the development of ideas is limited and at times repetitive. For instance, the writer mentions that play makes children fit and fresh, but this idea is not fully extended or supported with specific examples. While the prompt is generally addressed, the reasoning is somewhat over-generalized and lacks depth, aligning closely with a Band 5 performance where ideas are present but under-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the overall progression of ideas is hindered by weak transitions and mechanical cohesive devices. For example, sentences such as 'By this kind of teaching methods students are able in the study' and 'By teaching formal on the schools' create choppy and unnatural links between ideas. Referencing is also unclear in places, such as the pronoun 'it' in the concluding sentence ('In my opinion it is very vital to children focus...'). Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion requires better management, placing this response at Band 5.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, such as the frequent reuse of 'formal learning', 'study', 'childrens', and 'play'. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, including 'reached student very well', 'able in the study', 'teaching formal on the schools', and 'make their Carrier by play games' (where 'Carrier' is a spelling error for career). The range of vocabulary is minimally adequate for the task, but errors in word formation and collocation cause some difficulty for the reader, fitting the Band 5 descriptor.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates a very limited range of structures, with frequent grammatical errors that impede comprehension. Simple sentence forms predominate, and attempts at complex or compound structures are often faulty. Examples of errors include subject-verb agreement issues ('Childrens are able', 'play games is childrens'), incorrect prepositions ('focus in play', 'on the schools'), and awkward phrasing ('By only learning about student childrens feel quite bored'). Punctuation and article use are also erratic throughout the text. These frequent errors that cause difficulty for the reader place the grammar score at Band 4.5, rounded to 5.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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