Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Whether primary schools should focus more on formal education or let the children play has been the topic of debate for the past few decades. Some people argue that schools should focus more on formal the learning of children. However, many guardians are of opinion that individuals at a young age should be enaged more in physical activities. This essay will critically analyse both points of view with relevant examples and justifications.

Schools focus more on formal education of children because of many possible reasons. At a young age, children's habits are not rigid and their opinions are not firmly established yet. At this stage, children's minds are very much adpatable. Hence, it is very easy for kids to develop new habits and learn new things unlike adults who have strong beliefs and opinions about things.

While growing up, children have a lot of potential to grasp difficult concepts and ideas. According to scientists, whatever young people learn in their childhood remains with them throughout their lives.

That being said, physical activity is equally important for children because their body parts are continuously growing. Also at a young age, doing exercise and playing sports keep the children more focused and active. Hence, sufficient amount of muscle movement is very beneficial.

In my opinion, children should engage equally in both activites. Playing sports and moving their body parts are beneficial for their physical well-being whereas formal education equips them with life-long lessons, knowledge and ideas. A good balance of both can play a very impactful and significant role in their lives.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt. The writer considers the focus on formal learning in primary schools and offers a clear opinion that children should engage equally in both formal education and play. The position is maintained throughout the essay. However, some ideas lack deep extension. For instance, the paragraphs discussing why formal education is beneficial rely on general statements about children being adaptable rather than providing fully developed examples or specific insights into the classroom environment. Nevertheless, the main aspects of the task are covered well enough to satisfy the criteria, offering a clear stance supported by relevant reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a clear overall progression. Information and ideas are logically sequenced across paragraphs, moving from an introduction to arguments for formal learning, arguments for physical activity, and a concluding personal opinion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct themes. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, such as "However", "Hence", and "That being said". However, there are occasional awkward transitions and minor mechanical issues in referencing, such as repeating sentence starters like "At a young age" consecutively. Overall, the structure is coherent and easy to follow, representing a solid organizational control.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as "adaptable", "rigorous", "well-being", and "significant role". There are, however, some noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as writing "formal the learning" in the introduction and misspelling "adpatable" instead of adaptable, as well as using "enaged" for engaged. Furthermore, phrases like "body parts are continuously growing" sound somewhat unnatural compared to standard academic phrasing. Despite these occasional inaccuracies and word-choice errors, communication is never impeded, and the vocabulary remains generally functional.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures such as conditional and subordinate clauses like "Whether primary schools should focus more..." and "Hence, it is very easy for kids to develop..." There are several grammatical errors present throughout the text, including article misuse ("focus more on formal the learning"), spelling mistakes, and awkward phrasing ("doing exercise and playing sports keep the children"). Although these errors occur, they are generally non-systematic and do not impede communication. The writer maintains adequate control over basic sentence construction while attempting more intricate sentence patterns.

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