Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Nowadays, academic subjects like science and Mathematics have become the core focus of early childhood education. This has led many people to argue that these institutes are spending excessive time on these courses, which results in creative subjects being ignored. I completely agree with this view that there is an overemphasis on formal education in primary institutes, and I believe that co-curricular activities are absolutely beneficial for children's development and should be integrated into their daily school routines.

To begin with, a focus on traditional subjects is highly counter-productive to children's learning process and it overburdens young kids. This is because forcing children to focus only on science and mathematics ignores how they naturally learn. When schools spend long hours teaching these tough courses too early, students suffer from high stress and quickly lose interest in studying. This results in affecting their creativity, which stops children from developing their natural talents and critical thinking. For example, many young students facing heavy exam pressure experience childhood burnout and school anxiety. Therefore, it is clear that concentrating solely on academic courses causes more harm than good at a young age.

Furthermore, an integration of co-curricular activities into daily routine is vital for child's overall growth. By participating in games and other activities, students naturally learn essential skills like team work, leadership, communication and problem-solving skills, which books alone cannot teach. For example, using building block or group games can help students learn both math and social skills. Therefore, combining formal education with physical activities is crucial for student's educational and personal growth.

To conclude, I strongly believe that primary schools are putting so much time teaching complex subjects to students. These institutions should ensure that they blend both academic subjects and co-curricular activities in the school timetable so kids can learn without feeling stressed and burn out.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by clearly stating their position on formal learning in primary schools and discussing the importance of play and co-curricular activities. The introduction presents a clear viewpoint, and both body paragraphs extend and support the central arguments with logical reasoning and relevant examples, such as childhood burnout and the development of social skills through group games. Although some of the ideas could be pushed slightly deeper for a Band 8 level, the overall response is fully relevant, well-developed, and directly answers both parts of the prompt in a coherent manner, fitting well into the Band 7 descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay displays a clear logical organization and progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct focus, beginning with an introduction of the issue and the author's stance, followed by body paragraphs exploring the drawbacks of formal overemphasis and the benefits of play, and concluding with a summary. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'To conclude' are used appropriately to guide the reader through the argument. Paragraphing is logical and functional, although some referencing could be slightly smoother to push into higher bands, making a Band 7 score entirely appropriate.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The student demonstrates an adequate to sufficient range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating less common lexical items such as 'counter-productive', 'overemphasis', 'co-curricular activities', and 'childhood burnout'. While there are occasional minor lexical or collocational slips, such as 'using building block' (missing plural) and 'burn out' as a noun instead of 'burnout', communication is never impeded. The vocabulary allows for some precision and adequately conveys the student's ideas, aligning well with the expectations of a Band 6.5 or solid Band 6, rounded here to a 6.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay features a good mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over relative clauses and conditional-like structures (e.g., 'When schools spend long hours teaching these tough courses too early, students suffer...'). There are some minor grammatical errors, such as 'for child's overall growth' (missing article) and 'putting so much time teaching' instead of 'spending so much time teaching'. However, these errors are infrequent and do not impede communication. The majority of sentences are clear and well-structured, supporting a comfortable Band 6.5 performance.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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