Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Nowadays, academic subjects like science and mathematics have become the core focus of early childhood education. This shift has led many to argue that primary schools spend excessive time on these courses, resulting in the neglect of creative subjects. I completely agree with the view that formal education is overemphasized in primary institutes. Furthermore, I believe that co-curricular activities are highly beneficial for children's development and must be integrated into their daily school routines.

To begin with, focusing solely on traditional subjects is counter-productive and overburdens young learners. This occurs because forcing children to memorize complex concepts ignores their natural learning processes. When schools allocate long hours to demanding courses too early, students suffer from intense stress and quickly lose interest in studying. This ultimately stifles their creativity, preventing them from developing their natural talents and critical thinking skills. For instance, many young pupils facing heavy exam pressure experience childhood burnout and school-related anxiety. Therefore, concentrating exclusively on academic courses causes more harm than good at a young age.

Furthermore, integrating co-curricular activities into the daily routine is vital for a child's overall growth. By participating in games and collaborative tasks, students naturally acquire essential skills such as teamwork, leadership, communication, and problem-solving, which textbooks alone cannot teach. For example, utilizing building blocks or group games can help students learn both mathematical concepts and vital social skills. Therefore, combining formal education with physical and creative activities is crucial for a student's academic and personal progression.

To conclude, I strongly believe that primary schools dedicate too much time to teaching complex subjects. Educational institutions should ensure they blend academic coursework with co-curricular activities within the school timetable. This balanced approach will allow children to learn effectively without experiencing stress and burnout.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The student fully addresses all parts of the two-part prompt by clearly stating their agreement with the view that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and thoroughly discussing the importance of play alongside learning. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. The ideas are well extended and supported with relevant explanations and examples, such as mentioning childhood burnout and the use of building blocks and group games. The response meets all the requirements of a Band 7 or Band 8 in task response, presenting a well-developed argument with logical extensions for each point.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.0

The essay is logically organized and demonstrates a clear progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct central topic, starting with an introductory overview, followed by two well-structured body paragraphs addressing the prompt's two questions, and a concise conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'Therefore' are used effectively to guide the reader through the argument. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, contributing to a smooth overall flow of ideas. Referencing and substitution are clear and maintain good cohesive ties.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

The student demonstrates a sufficient and flexible range of vocabulary suited to an academic discussion. Less common lexical items are used with good awareness of style and collocation, such as 'counter-productive', 'overburdens', 'stifles their creativity', and 'co-curricular activities'. Word choices are generally precise, and there are only occasional minor limitations. Spelling and word formation are accurate throughout the essay, supporting fluent communication and allowing the reader to follow the arguments effortlessly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.0

The response features a wide variety of complex sentence structures used accurately. The writer successfully employs conditional and participial phrases, such as 'When schools allocate long hours to demanding courses too early, students suffer from intense stress...' and 'By participating in games and collaborative tasks, students naturally acquire essential skills...'. The majority of sentences are entirely error-free, with excellent control over punctuation and complex clauses. Grammar and punctuation never impede communication.

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