Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Some people argue that primary education centers concentrate too much on formal education while ignoring play sessions. I partially agree with this opinion as formal learining and play are equally important for the overall development of the child. Learning provides them with essential knowledge and playing helps them in socializing and in maintaining fitness.
On the one hand, formal education is necessary for children which attriute to gaining essential knowledge and prepares them for the real world. Since childhood training them to study will benefit them as the enter secondary school. Children should spend their valuable time on formal learning such as maths and science to secure jobs. For instance, a child with knowledge can secure employment easily compared with others.
On the other hand, play is crucial for overall development of the pupil. It helps them to socialize and gain insights on the world. Due to sports they will have the ability of leadership. Students can concentrate on their studies more effeciently given time to play. Sports help them to focus and relax from their education. For example, a student who plays can score better than the one who does not allocate time for sports.
In concluson, I agree that play and formal learning have benefits but I believe that they must be balanced. If one of any is neglected will have a hude impact on their future. Formal learning is necessary with time to play; hence primary schools must concentrate on formal learnng along with time allocating to play.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt by discussing whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and explaining the importance of play alongside study. The student establishes a clear position in the introduction ('I partially agree with this opinion') and maintains it throughout. Ideas are developed with supporting points and examples, such as mentioning how play helps with socialization and how formal subjects like mathematics prepare students for secondary school. However, some of the supporting arguments remain slightly generalized or repetitive, such as the example that 'a student who plays can score better than the one who does not allocate time for sports.' Despite these limitations, the task is adequately addressed, aligning well with the expectations of a Band 6.0 performance.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression. The text is divided into four standard paragraphs: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting opposing sides and balanced arguments, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to signal relationships between ideas, such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In concluson,' though there are minor mechanical errors in linking phrases. Referencing is generally clear, and each paragraph has a recognizable central topic. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, guiding the reader smoothly from the introduction of the dual perspective to the final verdict on balancing both aspects in primary education.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, attempting less common items such as 'overall development,' 'socializing,' 'securing employment,' and 'concentration.' However, there are several noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout the response, including 'learining,' 'attriute,' 'effeciently,' 'concluson,' and 'hude.' Additionally, phrases like 'time allocating to play' reflect awkward phrasing and collocation issues. While these lexical errors occur with some frequency, they do not severely impede overall communication, placing the writing firmly in the Band 6.0 category for this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses, such as 'Since childhood training them to study will benefit them as the enter secondary school' and 'a student who plays can score better than the one who does not allocate time for sports.' There are, however, frequent grammatical errors and typos, including subject-verb agreement issues ('If one of any is neglected will have'), missing articles, and typographical errors like 'as the enter' instead of 'as they enter.' Punctuation is generally functional, but the density of structural and grammatical slips means that error-free sentences are not in the majority.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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