Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is widely argued by some people that primary schools put a lot of concentration on organized and fixed learning systems. From my perspective, formal learning plays a significant role polishing students' personalities and making them punctual and professional from an early age. On the other hand, play time is equally crucial for children to develop interests and hobbies.
While the people who are concerned about this teaching method think that study becomes a burden if educational institutions will follow strict guidelines. Students who study in this environment are very focused and catious about their future goals. Furthermore, it enables them to reach the targets on time under guidance from their instructors. For example, a student who knows how to manage time from the primary school perform better in the future compared to other children. As a result, formal learning should be encouraged from the begining to make students disciplined and organized.
As far as I am concerned, children should be given enough free time to balance their lives with busy schedules. Play time also contributes a major part making children independent. The best example of this is that children who play different games and interact with their collegues are more confident than others. Furthermore, leisure time builds interests and part-time activities that could be helpful in the future. For instance, a child who play cricket from an early age can choose this as his profession.
In conclusion, focused learning system is important for building qualities that can be useful for professional life, while play time is also mandatory to allow children to maintain their lives and develop interests.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and how important it is for children to play as well as learn. The student establishes a clear position in the introduction, arguing that formal learning builds positive professional habits while play is equally crucial for development and balance. Ideas are generally relevant and extended with examples, such as mentioning time management and future career choices like cricket. However, some arguments lack deeper elaboration, and the conclusion slightly misrepresents the body by referring to a 'focused learning system' as if it were the sole focus. These minor limitations place the response firmly at Band 6.5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay displays a logical overall progression with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing each aspect of the prompt, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, such as 'Furthermore', 'On the other hand', and 'For example'. However, paragraphing could be better managed, as the second body paragraph awkwardly blends the discussion of formal learning constraints with time management. Additionally, referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as 'the people who are concerned about this teaching method think that study becomes a burden if educational institutions will follow strict guidelines', which lacks grammatical completion. These issues warrant a Band 6.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'punctal', 'independent', and 'professional life'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors throughout the text. For instance, the phrase 'put a lot of concentration on' is unnatural compared to 'place a heavy emphasis on'. Other inaccuracies include spelling and collocation slips like 'begining' instead of 'beginning', 'catious' instead of 'cautious', and 'collegues' instead of 'colleagues'. Because these errors do not impede overall communication but restrict precision, a Band 6 is appropriate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating relative clauses and conditional-like patterns (e.g., 'a student who knows how to manage time from the primary school perform better'). However, grammatical control is inconsistent, leading to frequent errors. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('a child who play cricket'), awkward dependent clauses ('if educational institutions will follow strict guidelines'), and missing prepositions or articles. Despite these errors, the meaning remains discernible throughout, placing the grammar at a Band 6 level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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