Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Well few people claim that primary schools pay attention too much on formal learning. It means that now in schools only maintain their studies or learn language.

From my perspective, those common public who discuss that the primary or especially private schools only emphasise about learning are true and I agree with them because nowadays, in education system students prepared only for exams but they should also get ready for sports. However children could not grow perfectly because they do not have anytime in schools or even in their homes. Because they have lot of homework or pressure of learning so they do not play or relax their minds. If schools allow to students that playing games and also have special lectures for children to doing different activities or creativity then tiny children can grow their minds fresh and healthy.

I think it is most beneficial for kids to play as well as learn in primary school classrooms. Because if the young generation have time to spend in their playing or gaming so youngsters may be going to school happily and confidently. When a child starts his school he or she may be cry on first day. However, If minors have games or creativity in their schools at first day so the next day child may be go to school gladly. I was teaching in a school and there was a special room for kindergarten students in that room there were so many toys and colours for youngsters. If a student cry in classroom so teachers allow to student to go to that room and play there.

Overall, firstly, in primary schools should not only focus on institutional education but also work on the game for students. Secondly, it is important that there should be a room of activities for kids in their schools.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and the importance of play alongside learning. The candidate takes a clear position in agreement with the premise, noting that exam pressure leaves little time for physical activity. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For instance, the discussion on kindergarten toys relies heavily on a single personal anecdote rather than broader arguments. While the ideas are relevant, they lack full extension, which places this response at Band 5.0 according to the task achievement descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, though the logical progression is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions and unclear referencing. Phrases like 'Well few people claim' and 'From my perspective, those common public' impede smooth flow. Cohesive devices are often inadequate or inaccurate, such as starting paragraphs with 'Overall, firstly...' and 'Secondly,...' in a confusing manner. The relationship between sentences is not always clear due to grammatical slips. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is faulty. This aligns with Band 5.0 descriptors for coherence and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, frequently relying on simple words like 'children', 'learning', and 'play'. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'pay attention too much on', 'common public', and 'pressure of learning'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with limited success ('institutional education', 'creativity'), but overall the range is narrow and inadequate for expressing precise meaning. Frequent word choice and form errors place this response at Band 4.0, bordering on Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures. While there are a few complex sentence attempts (e.g., 'If schools allow to students that playing games...'), they are frequently faulty and ungrammatical. Errors are numerous and persistent throughout the text, including tense inconsistencies, missing prepositions, and incorrect verb forms ('a student cry', 'teachers allow to student', 'child may be go'). These frequent errors can cause difficulty for the reader and obscure the intended meaning, corresponding to a Band 4.5 score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.