Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is often argued that some institute students wants to learn about other additional subjects rather than their main subjects There are several reasons why they thought it would be helpful because it broaden their knowledge which help to build their careers in a better way and also help them to pursue their goals in future. While, others believe it is more important to give all their attention and time to studying academic subjects. I strongly agree with this view and this essay explain why.

Firstly one of the main reason is that, some people believe that studying additional subjects should be helpful to learn about other fields. It can also expand their knowledge and help them to learn new skills which are beneficial for them to pursue their goals towards the future because learning about new different subjects allow them to adopt a new culture and skills which they can use and build their future. In addition it can also expand their thinking level because it can enhance their cognitive behavioral towards the world.For example, if we have additional skills we can find the jobs easily and we can adopt any environment we can't face much difficulty like if I'm the finance student I can learn the computer skills which can help me in future. So, it is beneficial to pursue the other subjects because it can provide additional information expect their main subjects.

Future more, other believes that gives all the attention to their main subjects because university courses required more time and attention for grades. If students focus on their main subjects they can get deeper knowledge about it which can be helpful for them to maintain their grades. For example, a medical student need significant time to studying their subjects and practice them to implement professional life. As a result focusing on the main subjects can create more career paths.

In conclusion, learning additional courses help students to think creatively and it can also expand their knowledge and skills which they can use in other fields. While focusing on main subjects can help them to achieve their goals in professional level. So, students focus on their main subjects if they want to achieve their goals and for others who have time they can also studying some additional subjects to broaden their knowledge.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response presents a position, but it misinterprets the prompt's core theme. The writing discusses whether students should learn additional subjects alongside their main subjects, rather than addressing whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning or the importance of play in the primary classroom. Consequently, the prompt is only tangentially addressed. The ideas are repetitive and underdeveloped, focusing heavily on job prospects rather than formal learning versus play in primary education. For instance, the writer states, 'if I'm the finance student I can learn the computer skills which can help me in future.' This misunderstanding of the task severely impacts the task response score, placing the essay in the lower bands due to missing the central premise of primary school education and play.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay is organized into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which provides a basic framework. However, the logical progression is weak because the arguments wander and contradict the prompt. Cohesive devices are used, but they are often awkward or inaccurate, such as 'While, others believe' and 'Future more'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion of the body paragraphs lacks clarity and smooth transitions. For example, sentences within the second paragraph jump abruptly from expanding knowledge to job finding without clear linking. Overall, the arrangement shows some organizational structure, but frequent mechanical referencing and repetitive phrasing limit its flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive throughout the response. The student frequently reuses words and phrases such as 'main subjects', 'additional subjects', 'goals', and 'expand their knowledge'. There are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'institute students wants', 'thinking level', and 'expect their main subjects' (instead of 'except'). While the range is minimally adequate to express general ideas about studying and jobs, the frequent lexical errors and lack of less common vocabulary place this response firmly in the lower-middle band range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. The student attempts complex sentences, but these attempts are frequently faulty and fraught with errors, such as 'There are several reasons why they thought it would be helpful because it broaden their knowledge which help to build their careers'. Subject-verb agreement errors are pervasive (e.g., 'institute students wants', 'other believes', 'courses required'). Punctuation is also problematic, with run-on sentences and missing commas hindering readability. Although simple meaning is occasionally communicated, the high frequency of grammatical mistakes causes persistent difficulty for the reader.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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