Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Health is wealth. In today's rapidly evolving world, matter of education of primary school children has become a matter of public interest, prompting a widesspread dabate regarding its impact on students and their education. Some people advocate that schools must focus on providing formal education while others underscore that physical education is as much essential as formal education. I strongly believe that physical activites are as crucial, as it is evidant that they benefit young learners mentally and physically.

To begin with, playing outside is just as important as it allows young academic participants to relax their minds. Going out and interacting with children of their age helps clearing mind fog and refreshes their brains which improves their ability to learn more. Beyond this, games improve physical health as well as allowing them to gain more confidence via social interactions. Ultimately, this teaches them to make better decisions in certain situations and assists in improving teamwork.

Some might debate that formal education is necessary to enhance knowledge. Arguably, confing students to books will not only dim their creativity but also burden them mentally which would eventually lead to poor academic performance. Addtionally, knowledge without implementation is useless. If students are not given time to explore, what they learn from textbooks is utterly useless.

To summerize, i still maintain that allowing children to play is just as significant. This is primaly because social benefits of going outside outweigh the advantages of being a bookwom while the chance of poor academic performance due to overworking academic participants as such early level reinforces this standpoint. Consequently, this perspective would not only benefit students but also contribute to development of society overall as youngsters are the base for society's building. However, i would surely suggest striking a balance between studies and enjoyment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and explaining the importance of play for children. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay, stating strongly that physical activities are crucial. The ideas are generally well developed, with logical arguments presented regarding mental relaxation, social interaction, and creativity. However, some arguments tend to be slightly repetitive, and certain assertions—such as the claim that confining students to books will dim their creativity—could benefit from more specific examples. Nonetheless, the task response is well-rounded and meets the requirements of Band 6.5 to 7.0, ultimately fitting comfortably into a Band 6.5 descriptor for fully covering the prompts while presenting slightly generalized supporting points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from introduction to body paragraphs and a summarising conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, with distinct paragraphs handling different facets of the argument. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, such as 'To begin with', 'Beyond this', and 'Consequently'. However, referencing and cohesion are occasionally faulty or mechanical, as seen in minor awkward transitions and repetitive phrasing ('is just as important', 'is just as significant'). Furthermore, the misuse of lowercase letters for the pronoun 'i' at various points detracts slightly from formal coherence. Overall, the structural flow is clear enough to secure a solid Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and academic phrases such as 'rapidly evolving world', 'public interest', and 'teamwork'. However, there are notable spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text, including 'widesspread dabate', 'activites', 'evidant', 'clearing mind fog', 'confing' (confining), 'Addtionally', 'summerize', 'primaly', and 'bookwom' (bookworm). While these errors do not severely impede communication, their frequency prevents the lexical score from reaching the higher bands. The student has a good underlying vocabulary base, but precision and spelling control need improvement to achieve a Band 6.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The essay exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating the student's ability to construct compound-complex sentences such as 'Some people advocate that schools must focus on providing formal education while others underscore that physical education is as much essential as formal education.' There are, however, several grammatical errors and awkward structures, such as 'is as much essential', 'helps clearing mind fog' (helps clear), 'what they learn from textbooks is utterly useless', and persistent capitalization errors regarding the pronoun 'i'. Punctuation is also slightly unreliable in places. Despite these flaws, the errors rarely impede communication, placing the grammatical performance firmly at a Band 6.0 level.

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