Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A number of people aruge that primary schools pay too much attention on formal way of learing, I believe to this statement to a large extent. It has great significance for kids to play as well as learn in their classroom.

First and foremost, in present era primary school mainly focus on teaching students in a formal way while students should allow to play with thier classes in school. As this step has many benefits. Itand contributes in the growth of the children and kids are more likely to explore their surrounding. Consequently, children make storng bonds and relationships with thier calls fellows. Such kind of attribute hleps them in their teenager as they already have idea what type of people they should keep friends. On the other hand, it will also them to become physically and mentally strong. For instnace, many kids who most often take part in physically activities are more likely to become better in sports and they also know what is good and bad for them since childhood.

Howover, there are also some backdraws of formal learning in primary schools. It is a common observation that children

often lack confidence while only studying in a classroom. They do not take much interest in outdoor games and thier

activites are limited only within a primises of classroom. For example, students learning only within their classroom

are good in their studies but when it comes to sports, they usually do not like to participate.

To conclude, I belive to this statement to a large extent that primary schools greatly focus on formal studies.

On the one hand, it has many drawbacks such as it does not give enough time to grow the minds of kids. So, students

should allow to take in plays as well as, they will see the world with their eyes in real meanings.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, agreeing with the statement regarding formal learning and discussing the importance of play alongside learning. A clear position is maintained throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For example, the writer mentions that play helps children build bonds and become physically and mentally strong, but these points are supported with superficial elaboration rather than detailed explanation or robust examples. The example provided regarding physical activities is quite general ('many kids who most often take part in physically activities are more likely to become better in sports'). While all parts of the task are addressed, the ideas remain somewhat under-developed, aligning the response with Band 6 descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay has a recognisable overall structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, demonstrating an attempt at logical organisation. Paragraphing is utilised, though paragraph boundaries and internal flow are occasionally affected by mechanical or faulty cohesion. For instance, transitional phrases like 'First and foremost', 'On the other hand', and 'Howover' are attempted, but referencing and logical progression are frequently hindered by awkward phrasing ('As this step has many benefits. Itand contributes in...'). Cohesive devices are sometimes over-used or inaccurate, and referencing is not always clear, leading to choppy progression. This overall arrangement corresponds to Band 5.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, touching on education and childhood development concepts ('formal learning', 'surrounding', 'class fellows', 'outdoor games'). However, there are frequent spelling errors ('aruge', 'learing', 'thier', 'hleps', 'instnace', 'Howover', 'backdraws', 'belive') and word choice inaccuracies ('formal way of learing', 'take in plays'). These errors occasionally impede communication or distract the reader. While less common vocabulary is attempted, the persistence of basic spelling mistakes and awkward lexical collocations prevents the writing from reaching a higher band, placing it firmly at Band 5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'It has great significance for kids to play as well as learn in their classroom' and 'students learning only within their classroom are good in their studies'. However, there are frequent grammatical errors in tense consistency, prepositions, and sentence structure (e.g., 'pay too much attention on', 'while students should allow to play', 'Itand contributes', 'will also them to become'). Complex sentence attempts are often faulty, and punctuation errors are present. Because the errors are frequent and occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, the grammar performance is best described at Band 5.

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