Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people in the society argued that primary schools are focus to much on formal learning. I totally agree, with the view that primary schools are putting pressure in the minds of young which is not good for the mental health of the child, I firmly believe that incorporating play in the classroom will help the development of the child mentally and physically.

Currently, primary schools are excessive pressuring the young minds by regular test and exams, which create the burden on young minds. They are forced to memorized the facts , sit or long hours on the disk with quietly and learn the complex subjects like mathematics reading the which they are ready. As a result, this rigid environment left less time for physical activity and creativity ,thus the child will feel boring and lose the natural joy of going to the school. This will affects their grades.

At this time, incorporating play in the classroom will help in the social development and physical activity. "Play is not a break from the studies but it is a powerful tool of learning". Playing helps in increasing creativity of a child and children will learn how to communicate, sharing and solve the problems. For instance, playing with blocks will help to understand to shapes more easier when compared simple worksheet and learn how to work as a team. Therefore, playing keeps them engaging and understand lessons more easily.

In conclusion, i think primary schools focusing on formal learning will burden the young minds and lose focus in studies. Combining play with studies will help in child social development increases the creativity.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt by clearly agreeing with the statement regarding formal learning pressure and explaining the importance of play in primary schools. The student takes a clear position from the introduction and extends their ideas throughout the body paragraphs, noting specific consequences of rigid environments and benefits of play like social development and creativity. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed or general, such as mentioning that lack of play 'affects their grades' without fully explaining how. Examples like 'playing with blocks' are provided, earning a solid Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introductory paragraph, two body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas, such as the critique of formal learning versus the benefits of play. However, referencing and cohesive devices are sometimes faulty or mechanical. For example, transitional phrases like 'At this time' are used awkwardly in context, and referencing pronouns like 'the which they are ready' are unclear. Additionally, some sentence-to-sentence transitions feel abrupt. These features place the response securely at Band 5.5.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student attempts a range of vocabulary suitable for the task, including terms like 'incorporating', 'creativity', 'social development', and 'rigid environment'. However, there are frequent inappropriate word choices and collocations, such as 'are focus to much', 'excessive pressuring', 'memorized the facts', and 'feel boring' instead of 'bored'. There are also awkward expressions like 'understand to shapes more easier'. While communication is generally maintained, the density of lexical errors prevents the score from reaching Band 6.0, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptor well.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses ('which create the burden') and conditional or participial structures. However, grammatical control is weak, with frequent errors throughout the text. Notable errors include subject-verb agreement issues ('Many people... argued'), incorrect verb forms ('are focus to', 'learning the which they are ready'), preposition errors ('sit or long hours on the disk with quietly'), and tense inconsistencies. These errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and reflect Band 5.0 characteristics.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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