Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people belives that primary schools resist too much on formal learning system.

Yes, definitely majority of people argue that primary based institutions are focusing too much formal education. They belived these primary base institutions are focusing on educational matrieal rather than other activities. These peoples belives that students must be engaging on other uneducational activities like sport events, physical and emotional well-being etc.In my prespects, formal education is essential element but too much focus on formal education specially primary level is not a good level. Because primary based students are childrens so institutions are focusing on formal education as well as uncurricular activites. These primary based students are participating various activities.

For instance, majority of the developing countries have setting-up their education system where curricular activities are becoming a essential part of student life especially kids and children are most beneficiary to the system. The teachers have learned their students various activities as like problem solving skills and analytical exposure of for beyound things.In undeveloped countries have unfortunateley trapped in wrong syatem where books are primary but other activities are unmodified. So formal learning and uncurricular activities are both important for child's development .

In conculsion, formal education has their on athentification and laibility but uncurricular-based activities are non to second-one. So the both systems are essential no one is unnesscery. Teachers and parents reliaze the importancy of bo

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: agreeing with the formal learning focus and discussing the importance of play in primary schools. However, the response falls short of the 250-word minimum requirement, containing only 230 words, which incurs a penalty under Task Achievement. Ideas are repetitious and lack full development. For instance, the student states 'students must be engaging on other uneducational activities like sport events, physical and emotional well-being' but fails to elaborate on why these are beneficial. While the writer's position is generally clear, the supporting examples lack depth and specific detail, remaining quite generalised throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the paragraphing is somewhat erratic and incomplete, trailing off at the end ('Teachers and parents reliaze the importancy of bo'). Logical progression is hindered by repetitive phrasing and weak transitional devices. For example, sentences often start abruptly, such as 'In my prespects, formal education is essential element' followed by disconnected justifications. Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate or awkward, as seen in 'In undeveloped countries have unfortunateley trapped in wrong syatem'. While an overall stance can be discerned, the structural coherence is significantly disrupted by frequent errors in referencing and sentence linkage.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The lexical resource is limited and repetitive. The student frequently misuses vocabulary, such as using 'resist' instead of 'insist' or 'focus' in the opening sentence ('Some people belives that primary schools resist too much on formal learning system'), and inventing terms like 'uneducational activities' instead of extracurricular or non-academic activities. Spelling errors are frequent ('matrieal', 'prespects', 'athentification', 'laibility', 'unnesscery', 'reliaze', 'importancy'). Although the vocabulary is adequate to convey a basic message, the numerous inaccuracies in word choice and spelling impede fluency and restrict the band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. There are pervasive errors in basic sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and tense usage, such as 'Some people belives', 'majority of people argue that primary based institutions are focusing', and 'In undeveloped countries have unfortunateley trapped'. Complex structures are attempted—for example, using conditional-like reasoning with 'Because primary based students are childrens so institutions are...‘—but these are heavily flawed and frequently ungrammatical. Punctuation is also problematic, and sentences often lack appropriate finite verbs or contain dangling modifiers. These frequent errors cause considerable difficulty for the reader.

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