Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, it is widely believed that schools providing primary education are providing a more formal education. I partially agree with this statement and i believe it is crucial for kids development to strike a balance between curricular and extra curricular activities.

Following a fixed, well planned curriculum for primary students aids them as they will be well equipped and mentally prepared for their upcoming classes. A formal learning pattern provides structure, guidance and stability to the children in their crucial learning years wherein they develop a strong base for their higher education. For instance, a child moving from pre-primary to primary education will be have a smooth transition with less anxiety and reduced terror of a drastic change. They will be mentally prepared and have a better experience.

A formal learning pattern not only focuses on studies, but also provides wider opportunities to learn and explore extra-curricular activities like sports or arts. They are provided with equal opportunities to develop cognitive as well as lateral thinking where in they get a chance to explore options they like and would want to pursue in future. To illustrate, a child learning skills to play cricket along with studies will be able to save time and can invest his time in something more creative after school and understand himself better.

Furthermore,there can certain demerits to this method, like schools following a fixed pattern for a long time and resisting the changes brought about by various advancements. For example, the recent developments has brought a wave of AI, and if students are not well equipped while still dwelling in the history, they can fall behind in the actual world.

Taking everything into account, I believe formal learning is beneficial. However, a certain amount of flexibility can be cherry on the cake for the students.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the task prompt: whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and the importance of play alongside learning. You clearly state your partial agreement in the introduction and maintain a consistent position throughout the essay. Ideas are extended with relevant examples, such as mentioning the transition from pre-primary to primary education and discussing the influence of artificial intelligence. However, some arguments lack full depth, particularly regarding how play is integrated into the classroom, as the third paragraph shifts more towards extra-curricular activities rather than classroom play itself. Nevertheless, all parts of the prompt are covered sufficiently to meet the criteria for Band 6.5, leaning towards Band 7 given the clear position and relevant supporting points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a logical overall progression and clear paragraphing, with each paragraph addressing a distinct aspect of the prompt. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as 'Following a fixed, well planned curriculum', 'Furthermore,' and 'Taking everything into account,'. However, referencing and cohesion occasionally feel a bit mechanical or imprecise, such as the pronoun reference in 'They are provided with equal opportunities' in the third paragraph, where the exact antecedent is slightly ambiguous. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, but the logical flow between sentences could be tightened to achieve a higher band. Overall, the organizational structure is clear and easy to follow, supporting a Band 6.5 score.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and collocations such as 'smooth transition', 'cognitive as well as lateral thinking', and 'fixed pattern'. There are, however, some lexical inaccuracies, word-choice errors, and missing articles or punctuation issues (e.g., lowercase 'i', 'kids development' instead of 'children's development', 'will be have a smooth transition', and 'recent developments has'). Spelling is generally correct, and while these errors do not impede communication, they restrict the lexical score. To reach a higher band, more precise word choices and stricter control over collocations are required.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses ('as they will be well equipped') and conditional structures. However, grammatical errors are fairly frequent and occasionally distract the reader. Examples include minor punctuation slips, missing hyphens in compound adjectives ('extra curricular'), subject-verb agreement errors ('recent developments has'), and awkward phrasing like 'will be have a smooth transition'. Although these errors rarely impede overall communication, they prevent the essay from achieving a Band 7. The grammatical control is characteristic of a solid Band 6, featuring a functional mix of structures alongside persistent minor inaccuracies.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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