Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Primary schools plays an important in forming the basic foundation of a students' education.Nowadays, some people believe primary school focus mostly on textbook learning. I strongly agree to this opinion, the primary schools are paying too much attention to formal learning.
During the present time, the schools have divert all their focus on textbook learning.The students are facing a constant pressure to keep all their focus on their course books . The education system push them to learn everything written in the books word by word. The students are not given practical lectures which may help them understand the concepts throughly. Every year the education department make big claims that the education system is improving , they are doing reforms but till now all these claims are proved to be just empty words.
Moreover, the lack of the experiment base study has started to show its impacts. Most of the students pass the primary school by learning the books somehow, but when they are promoted to higher classes they struggled to pass them . As the result, most of the students drop out from the college.
The maximum focus on theory base learning has started to impact the mental health of students. The absence of activity base learning has make education a huge burden for the students .The students have no time to relax. For an instance, I have seen many of my friends experiencing nervous breakdown just because they are afraid they will not score their desired marks, and will disappoint their parents and teachers.
That's why ,i firmly support that the primary school should aim to make learning a more fun and experiment base activity for students.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt. The writer clearly states an opinion on the first question ("I strongly agree to this opinion, the primary schools are paying too much attention to formal learning") and discusses the importance of play and experimental learning in the subsequent paragraphs. Ideas are extended with examples and explanations regarding the mental health impacts and the lack of practical lectures. However, the development tends to overgeneralise slightly without robust concrete examples, placing it comfortably in Band 6. The position remains clear throughout the essay, fulfilling the core requirements of the task effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay has a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate distinct ideas, such as textbook pressure versus mental health impacts. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical. For example, there are issues with run-on sentences and comma splices in places like "I strongly agree to this opinion, the primary schools are paying too much attention..." Furthermore, referencing and transitional phrases can be a bit repetitive or awkwardly constructed (e.g., "During the present time"). Overall, the logical progression is apparent, but the mechanical nature of cohesive devices keeps this criterion at Band 6.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as "foundational," "education department," and "nervous breakdown." However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as "experiment base study" instead of "experiment-based study" or "practical learning," and "textbook learning" used repetitively. Spelling is generally accurate, but some minor slips and awkward phrasings occur throughout the text. The vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey meaning, but errors in word formation prevent it from reaching a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over structure. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ("Primary schools plays", "the education department make", "absence... have make"), missing articles ("at primary school"), and punctuation errors like comma splices. While these errors do not severely impede overall communication, their frequency prevents the essay from achieving a Band 6.0, as error-free sentences are not in the majority.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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