Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the current societal landscape, there is a debate on whether schools should invest more efforts on formal learning or maintain a balance between playing and learning. There is no doubt that play is equally important for children besides learning. Therefore, I partially agree with this statement.

On the one hand, learning from an early age is if utmost importance for children in the primary schools. They should focus on teaching students to write, read, and speak properly. It is believed that too much focus on studies from playgroup is essential for the base development of a child. For example, children in the primary schools are taught the phonics in order to enable them to learn the alphabets with matching sounds. Moreover, more attention in drawn to addition, multiplication, and division methods in the junior classes. In this way, they learn gradually, and eventually improving in their academics.

On the other hand, while learning is pivotal, keeping a balance between play and learn is more important. Students should be given enough time to play in the playgrounds. To illustrate, schools should set curriculums that include learning by playing. If teachers do fun-activities with children, they would probably pick the things faster. Hence, their brains remains active throughout the entire class. Furthermore, playing is also crucial for lowering the cortisol levels in the body, which lead to stress and anxiety.

To sum up, while some people argue that primary schools should dedicate more time in formal learning, I believe, it will leave too little time for childrens' developmental play. Thus, a balance is required between learning and playing, so that children could grow both academically and personally.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student addresses all parts of the two-part prompt by discussing both the focus on formal learning and the importance of play in primary schools. A clear position is stated in the introduction where the writer partially agrees with the opinion. Ideas are generally extended and supported, such as giving examples of phonics and math concepts in the second paragraph, and discussing cortisol levels and concentration in the third paragraph. However, some arguments tend to over-generalise slightly, and the development could be pushed further to reach a higher band level. Overall, the task response is well-structured and fully relevant to the prompt, successfully meeting all criteria for a Band 6.5 or solid Band 7 performance, comfortably placing it at Band 6.5 due to slight under-development in parts.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a clear logical organisation and overall progression. The response is divided into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, two body paragraphs addressing opposing views, and a concise conclusion. Cohesive devices are used adequately to guide the reader, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'For example', and 'To sum up'. However, referencing and cohesion are at times slightly mechanical, as seen with phrases like 'learning from an early age is if utmost importance' (typographical error aside, the flow is formulaic). Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, ensuring the essay is easy to follow despite occasional minor lapses in cohesive flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'societal landscape', 'cortisol levels', and 'developmental play'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors throughout the text, including 'invest more efforts on' instead of 'in', 'if utmost importance' instead of 'of', and 'brains remains' (subject-verb agreement error with vocabulary context). Despite these inaccuracies, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey meaning clearly without impeding the reader. Spelling is generally accurate, but the precision required for higher bands is lacking due to awkward phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating conditional structures ('If teachers do fun-activities...') and relative clauses. There are several grammatical errors present, such as 'learning from an early age is if utmost importance', 'more attention in drawn', 'brains remains active', and the plural possessive/contraction issue in 'childrens' developmental play'. Additionally, phrasing like 'eventually improving in their academics' lacks a main verb clause structure. While these errors occur with some frequency, they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the argument without significant difficulty. This fits the profile of Band 6 grammar.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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