Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Academic education and outdoor activities go hand in hand to make children ready for their adult life. It is believed that schools pressure students to concentrate more on structured education. I partly agree with this notion because performing physical and creative activities outside the classroom are also crucial for children's well-being.

One key factor for this stance is that formal education is beneficial for every student because it enables them to acquire knowledge of a certain field. Excellent performance in academics makes students eligible for various prestigious designations. Children are more keen on learning new lessons, so offering professional and systematic education during school years develops a sense of responsibility in childhood. Moreover, several professions require full-time focus on curriculum in order to become an expert, such as, medicine, engineering, etc.

On the other hand, sports are as beneficial for kids as their curriculum. Owing to the fact that play makes children physically active and psychologically more confident. They learn to cope with challenging circumstances by taking part in different outdoor or indoor games. Furthermore, working in a team boosts their self-esteem and confidence. Communication is a key skill that can only be learnt by interacting with people from different backgrounds and participating in sports and quiz competitions is the best way to improve these useful skills.

In conclusion, formal education is fruitful for making a person eligible for competitive examinations. Participating in playing activities is also critical for children. Schools should encourage kids to explore their talents outside the class; however, academic performance cannot be ignored.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt successfully. The writer clearly states a position on whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and discusses the importance of play alongside study. The ideas are relevant and generally well supported, such as when the author notes that certain professions require a full-time focus on curriculum while sports boost confidence and teamwork. However, some arguments could be extended further; for instance, the link between playing and coping with challenging circumstances is introduced but not fully exemplified. Overall, the task is addressed well, aligning with the criteria for Band 7, where a clear position is maintained and all parts of the prompt are covered.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay presents a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct focus: introduction, formal education, outdoor activities, and conclusion. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well to guide the reader, seen in phrases like 'One key factor', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. However, referencing and transitions are at times a little formulaic or slightly mechanical, such as the fragment 'Owing to the fact that play makes children physically active...' which lacks a main clause connection. These minor cohesion issues prevent the writing from reaching the higher bands, placing it firmly at Band 6.5 or 7.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

The student demonstrates an adequate to sufficient range of vocabulary for the task. Less common lexical items are attempted with some success, such as 'structured education', 'prestigious designations', and 'psychologically more confident'. There is an awareness of style and collocation, although some minor inaccuracies occur, such as 'participating in playing activities' rather than simply 'playing activities' or 'recreational activities'. Word choices are generally appropriate and do not impede communication. Spelling and word formation are accurate throughout, supporting a solid Band 6.5 performance, which rounds comfortably to a Band 7 given the precision in terms like 'curriculum' and 'responsibility'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over relative clauses and conditional structures. Examples include 'Children are more keen on learning new lessons, so offering professional and systematic education...' and 'Communication is a key skill that can only be learnt by interacting...'. There are some grammatical errors, most notably a sentence fragment ('Owing to the fact that play makes children physically active and psychologically more confident.') where the dependent clause stands alone without a main clause. Despite this and a few minor punctuation slips, the majority of sentences are clear and well-formed, causing no difficulty for the reader and fitting the Band 6.5 descriptor well.

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