Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
There are a great debate nowadays that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.i complitely agree with that and in this essay i will state the reasons why i'm holding my view.Also,it's imprtant for children to play as well as learn in primary school.
on one hand, the primary school method in learning is to much formal and the chief reason for holding my prespect is that the system school focus on result more than understanding,when it's crucial to make young people enjoying what they do.Furthermore,schools adapted a strict rules on thier area so the child must save information even if they don't understand it and that's lead to a sophisticated situation for childreen on a young ages.Finally,the system in school adpted a mthode where child stack information without knowledge ,in result the child become tired and don't know what doing with that information.
In the other hand ,from my point of view i believe that it's crucial to make blanace between learning and playing in the primary school classroom.First,games that have an relation with the course improving the inderstood of coursee in better way.In addition,childreen can stack data and notes better when the subject related to a game.Furthermore,it's neseecary for schools to do a breake between class and class and let young student play or do thier hobbies because tha's recharge the enrgie of child and keep them focus.
In conclusion,schools foucusing only in basic and formal learning and that's eefect the child motivation and energie so it's important to let childreen to play as well as learn in the primary school.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, agreeing that primary schools focus too much on formal learning and discussing the importance of play alongside study. However, the development of ideas is limited and somewhat repetitive. Phrases like "the system school focus on result more than understanding" lack precise support, and the reasoning tends to generalise without providing specific, concrete examples from the writer's own experience or knowledge. The position is stated clearly at the beginning, but the overall depth of exploration aligns well with the Band 5 descriptors, where ideas are somewhat under-developed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, showing an attempt at logical organisation with transitional markers such as "on one hand", "In the other hand", and "In conclusion". However, paragraphing is affected by mechanical and repetitive transitions, and the use of cohesive devices is frequently inaccurate, such as "In the other hand" instead of "On the other hand". Referencing is at times unclear, and progression within paragraphs stalls due to repetitive phrasing. Overall, the structural framework is basic and aligns with Band 5 standards.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, featuring frequent word-formation errors and spelling mistakes throughout the text, such as "complitely", "prespect", "adpted", "mthode", "inderstood", and "foucusing". The student attempts less common items like "sophisticated situation", but these collocations are unnatural and inaccurate. While the language is minimally adequate to convey the basic message, the density of lexical errors and limited range restrict the score to Band 4.5, rounded to 5.0 based on the positive identification of communicative intent.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but these attempts are frequently faulty. There are persistent basic grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing articles ("at young ages"), subject-verb agreement issues ("the system school focus"), incorrect verb forms ("schools adapted a strict rules"), and punctuation errors such as spacing issues after commas and periods. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the text from reaching a higher band, fitting comfortably within the Band 4.0 to 4.5 criteria.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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