Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is believed by some individuals that preliminary schools gives too much emphasis on formal learning. I also agree with them and think that alongside academic education it is important to gain social and technical skills. These skills can be learnt from childhood through making friends and playing with them. This essay briefly discusses the said statement, as well as the reasoning behind my agreement. Moreover, the importance of playing is also illustrated here.

Firstly, it is said that a good amount of people have the belief that our primary education is too academic rather than being technical. Primary schools in most countries start educating children how to read and write from an early age, which is really important; there is no denying that. However, they fail to teach them the skills and manners that is essential to survive in this world. To elaborate further, kids may excel in academia, but fail to conduct themselves in difficult situations, such as how to maintain a good relationship with someone, how to treat people, or how conduct themselves in front of people etc. These life skills can be learnt in many ways; one of them can be while playing.

Kids making friends and socializing with their peers can be a great way to learn socializing and gaining life skills. Hence, it is important for the educational institutions to include such periods during their lesson to make the students engage with each other. Furthermore, kids love to immitate adults while playing. So, it is important for the educators to engage and set good examples for them. For an instance, making them roleplay and play out certain scenarios in order to teach them behaivors, that are acceptable in those cases. It is observed in a study that the kids who have been engaging in such activities, have enhance their social and life skills.

In conclusion, as some people I also believe that formal teaching in our primary schools is not enough to educate children properly. It is crucial for them to gain practical knowledges to live in a healthy society and that can be done by simply engaging with their age groups through playing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses both parts of the two-part prompt. The student presents a clear position agreeing that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and addresses the importance of play alongside learning. Ideas are extended with examples, such as roleplaying scenarios and social skill development. Although the introduction contains some repetitive phrasing ("This essay briefly discusses the said statement..." which is slightly formulaic), the core arguments are well-developed and relevant throughout the essay. The response satisfies all requirements of the task comprehensively.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay is logically organised with a clear progression of ideas from introduction to conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with each body paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the prompt (the limits of formal learning and the benefits of play). Cohesive devices such as "Firstly", "Furthermore", and "In conclusion" are used effectively to guide the reader, although referencing is occasionally slightly repetitive or mechanical (e.g., repeating phrases like "it is important"). Overall, cohesion is well-managed and supports the clear structure of the argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate to good range of vocabulary suited to the academic task, utilizing terms such as "preliminary schools" (though "primary" is intended), "excel in academia", "socialising", and "practical knowledges". There are some noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as "preliminary schools" instead of primary schools, "gain practical knowledges" (knowledge is uncountable), and minor typos like "immitate" and "behaivors". However, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey precise meaning without impeding communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with moderate success. There are several good complex structures used, such as "Primary schools in most countries start educating children how to read and write from an early age, which is really important; there is no denying that." However, a number of grammatical inaccuracies occur throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., "preliminary schools gives", "skills and manners that is essential"), punctuation slips, and minor preposition errors. While these errors are noticeable, they do not prevent understanding of the core message.

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