Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some believe that formal studying in school from early ages is good for the young adluts. I strongly agree that understanding how to use formal speech in society during primary schooling is better, in balance with playing sometimes.

On one hand, focusing on formal learning duing early ages can give childern idea how to use a formal speech with opposite person and manage the sutuation accordingly in the society. In addition learing in early stages help to maintain better connection amoung people with different ages. For example a child in school of seventh grade focus on formal learning and also does better in speaking with others, it can help children to give any speech in fornt of school ahd other elders during any science fair in polite way which will make good opinion on others. So learning in correct age is important.

On the other hand, playing during school time is good sometimes, it helps childern to learn new skills which can improve focus and creativity. For example in a study from KL university states that childeren invoving in different activities help them to learn things faster compaired yo childern with no activities other than reading. Playind at moderation in better thant not playing.

In conclusion, i believe that foucs on formal speech of children is important at early ages is important, however giving children to participate in other activities will hwlp them to improve their focus and make them to learn faster, so in my opinion, on balance, learning formal speech and some time on learning new skills in school is best for students.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses the two-part prompt by discussing the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and explaining the importance of play in primary school. However, the interpretation of 'formal learning' is somewhat restricted to 'formal speech,' which narrows the scope of the argument. The position is clear throughout, and relevant ideas are presented, such as social skill development through formal schooling and cognitive benefits from play. Nevertheless, the support for these ideas tends to be limited and slightly repetitive. For example, the reference to a 'seventh grade' student illustrating primary school learning is slightly inaccurate regarding age groups, and the evidence regarding the KL university study lacks specific detail. Overall, the ideas are sufficiently developed to meet the requirements for a Band 6.0, as all parts of the prompt are addressed, though some areas remain under-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph-by-paragraph structure containing an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Logical sequencing is present, moving from formal learning to play, and finally synthesizing both in the conclusion. However, cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in repetitive transitional phrases like 'On one hand' and 'On the other hand.' Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the pronoun 'it' in sentences like 'for example a child in school... it can help children.' Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate distinct themes, but the overall flow suffers from minor disruptions in sentence-to-sentence cohesion, aligning the response with the descriptors for Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating central ideas about education and childhood development. Words and phrases such as 'creativity,' 'manage the situation,' and 'participate in other activities' demonstrate a functional lexical capability. However, there are numerous word choice and spelling errors throughout the text, including 'adluts' instead of adults, 'duing' instead of during, 'childern' instead of children, 'sutuation,' 'amoung,' 'ahd,' 'in fornt,' 'compaired,' 'Playind,' 'moderation,' 'thant,' and 'foucs.' These errors occasionally impede smooth reading, although the meaning remains generally clear. Because the vocabulary range is adequate yet constrained by frequent spelling and lexical slips, a band score of 5.0 is appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some structural variety through subordinate clauses and infinitive phrases, such as 'I strongly agree that understanding how to use formal speech... is better.' However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors in articles, prepositions, verb forms, and agreement. Examples include 'from early ages,' 'give childern idea,' 'learning in early stages help,' 'a child in school of seventh grade focus,' 'playind at moderation in better thant not playing,' and 'giving children to participate.' These frequent errors cause occasional difficulty for the reader and prevent the grammar from reaching a higher band. The control demonstrated aligns best with a Band 5.0 descriptor, where frequent errors persist despite attempts at complex structures.

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