Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern context, I strongly believe that primary schools concentrate too much on formal learning rather than focusing on other physical activities. In my opinion, it is very important for student to play as well as learn in the classroom.

To begin with, educational institutions are focusing on studying activities only. Students are not able to play and enjoy other movement with their friend, which may cause many mental problem in future. Some students are not good at their studies, but they were interested in playing games but they are not be able to play the games according to their choice.

Secondly, the main cause of children been avoiding play is their own parents and the management system of school. According to the parents perspective, children should focus on study, and they think there is no career in sports and they cannot achieve anything in sports. Parents want their children to become doctors, engineers, pilots, and many other professionals. On the other hand, the school management system does not know the interests of students. They just focus on the results of children, which helps them advertise their school name on the basis of percentages.

For example, I have my own experience. When I was in Grade 5, I was very talented in playing chess. After one year, I was admitted to a new school, but there was no routine for sports. They just wanted their students to concentrate on education. As a result, I became poor in both study and chess.

In conclusion, primary schools should promote other curriculum activities rather than targeting too much on formal learning. Teachers should make students aware of digital subjects and other things that may be outside the subject matter. Parents should also motivate their children and help them do alternative activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and the importance of play in the classroom. A clear position is established in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas tends to be somewhat superficial and relies heavily on personal opinion rather than well-extended arguments. For instance, the discussion regarding parents and school management in the second body paragraph touches on valid points about academic pressure, but the explanation remains brief. The personal example in the fourth paragraph provides some support, but overall, the ideas require deeper elaboration to reach a higher band level. Consequently, the performance aligns well with the Band 6 descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is utilised adequately to separate distinct ideas, such as the role of parents and schools versus personal experience. However, cohesion at the sentence level is occasionally mechanical or faulty. For example, transitional phrases like 'To begin with' and 'Secondly' are used, but referencing within sentences can be imprecise, such as 'children been avoiding play' and awkward pronoun usage. The logical progression is generally maintained, but the flow is occasionally disrupted by phrasing and connectivity issues, placing this criterion solidly at Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'educational institutions', 'management system', and 'alternative activities'. However, there are notable word-choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'studying activities', 'movement with their friend', and 'mental problem in future'. Additionally, grammatical forms of words are sometimes confused, as seen in 'children been avoiding play' instead of 'children being'. While communication is not impeded and the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main arguments, the frequency of lexical errors prevents the score from rising above Band 5.5 or 6.0. A score of 5.5 reflects these limitations accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some variety in structure. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('student to play'), tense inconsistencies ('they were interested... but they are not be able'), and article or preposition omissions. For instance, 'poor in both study and chess' and 'targeting too much on formal learning' display inaccurate prepositions and collocations. While these errors do not completely obscure the meaning of the text, they occur with enough frequency to cause occasional difficulty for the reader, fitting the Band 5 descriptor.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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