Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Education plays paramount role in every individual life. There is a growing belief that primary schools pays much emphasis on formal academic learning. I firmly agree with this notion, as children need opportunities to develop through play as well as classroom instructions. However, academic learning should remain an crucial part of primary schools with balanced recreational activities.
To commence with, formal learning establishing the basic academic foundation leading to reading, writing, mathematics and communication skills as strong basic knowledge helps students in secondary schools. Furthermore, structured lessons can teach children discipline, concentration and time management this may provide the foundation to prepare them for future learning. For instance, regular study session can gradually improve students ability to solve maths problems in less time.
On the flip side, play is equally important for children overall development, unlike convectional learning social skills helps children to learn teamwork, sharing and moral values owing to alleviate academic stress and makes school more enjoyable. Epitome, team sports teach cooperation and responsibilty while keeping them physically active. Moreover, excessive homework causing more stress to students resulting to loss of interest in studying as well as may limit creativity and independent thinking.
In the conclusion, although formal learning are necessary for builing a strong educational foundation, extra curriculam activities is also beneficial for developing childrens social skills and physical well being. Therefore, balanced approach should be there to enhance their enthusiam for learning.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The student addresses all parts of the two-part prompt by discussing whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and evaluating the importance of play. A clear position is maintained throughout the response, supported by relevant ideas regarding foundational skills and social development. However, the ideas are sometimes under-developed, and the response falls short of the minimum length requirement, containing only 236 words instead of the required 250 words. This under-length impacts the overall development and completeness of the task, capping the achievement score at band 5.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay displays a generally coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph structure, using standard introductory, body, and concluding paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used to signal transitions, such as 'To commence with', 'Furthermore', and 'On the flip side'. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical, and the use of transitional phrases occasionally feels forced (e.g., 'Epitome, team sports teach...'). Paragraphing is present, but logical progression within paragraphs is occasionally disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'paramount', 'foundational', and 'cooperation'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors throughout the text, such as 'primary schools pays much emphasis' instead of 'pay', 'convectional learning' instead of 'conventional', and 'owing to alleviate' instead of 'helping to alleviate'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but lexical inaccuracies restrict the score to band 5.5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control is inconsistent. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('formal learning establishing', 'formal learning are necessary'), missing punctuation causing run-on sentences ('time management this may provide'), and prepositional errors ('in every individual life'). While communication is rarely completely impeded, these frequent errors and faulty complex structures place the grammar performance firmly within the band 5 descriptor.
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