Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is argued that the highest amount of focus is on book based learning in primary institutions. In my point of view, I am totally agree with this argument. While the formal learning develops students brain activity, I believe sports plays a significant role to enhance their physical and mental ability.

There are several reasons why an increasing number of person argued about schooling in primary schools. One primary reason would be the institutions are strict towards academic result of the children. This is because the teachers think every children are likely to get better score in the exams. For instance, while one children might find the reading more enjoyable, other may prefer playing or drawing. As a result, their growth can not be properly developed because they don't realize their potential. Furthermore, to learn communication skills and team work, bookish knowledge is not enough.

Consequently, playing activity is a major factor that helps the children enjoy their school days. This is because children are mostly enjoy playing with their families. While children are forced to educate them to schools, playing games and sports don't require any pressure.Additionally, sports activities produce much pleasure as well as benefit for the health because these activties reduce the stress. For instance, sports event in the primary schools make a competitive atmosphere towards the children which leads them how to deal with real life struggles. Another compelling reason for the argument would be that it declined the monotony of the classes because continues period of lectures can be boring. For instance. children can't concentrate on the study that long which resuts in lack of interests towards study.

To sum up, although gathering knowldege is required for career opprotunities and to cope up with the world, focusing only formal learning fails to provide other essential skills. On the other hand, fun games can engage children and develop their fundamental practical skills and mental health.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning, and the importance of play alongside learning. The writer takes a clear position by stating "I am totally agree with this argument" and supports it with relevant ideas regarding physical development, stress reduction, and social skills. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed or repetitive, such as the discussion on monotony and concentration. Examples are provided, but they remain somewhat generalized. This performance aligns well with Band 6, as all parts of the task are addressed with relevant ideas, though some extension lacks depth.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay has a coherent overall arrangement with logical paragraphing, dividing the introduction, reasons for formal focus, benefits of play, and conclusion clearly. Cohesive devices are used, such as "Furthermore", "Consequently", and "To sum up", but referencing and cohesion are sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in phrases like "while one children might find" and "This is because children are mostly enjoy playing". Paragraphing is adequate, but transitions between some sentences feel abrupt. This corresponds to a Band 6 descriptor where cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is not always completely clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common terms such as "book based learning", "monotonicity", and "practical skills". However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as saying "I am totally agree" instead of "I totally agree", "person argued" instead of "people argue", and "declined the monotony" instead of "decreases the monotony" or "relieves monotony". Spelling and morphological errors like "opprotunities" also occur. Because the vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the message despite these inaccuracies, a Band 6 score is appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing subordinate clauses such as "While the formal learning develops students brain activity" and "although gathering knowldege is required". However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., "every children are", "one children might find", "children are mostly enjoy") and articles. Punctuation errors also appear, such as a missing space after a full stop ("For instance. children"). These errors do not generally impede communication, fitting the Band 6 profile where a mix of structures is used alongside errors that rarely block comprehension.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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