Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
some people believe that primary school place too much emphasis on formal education, while others believe that playing is equally important with study for overall development of children's . I agree that academic learning is essential, but I believe that children should also have sufficient opportunities to play and develop practically and social skills.
on the one hand, Children need knowledge about basic subjects such as reading, writing, mathematics, science, and English to build a strong foundation for higher education and to create better career opportunities in the future. For example, and children's can learn problem solving through mathematics which help them to become more confident and develop their skills and concentration. Furthermore, through other subjects like English can improve there communication skills and help to open great pathways of job opportunities in future.
on the other hand, play improves physical health and fitness. additionally, through several teamwork activities can improve children's communication and teamwork skills. By playing children's can reduces stress and prevents boredom from continuous studying. Moreover, some activities beyond the classroom education can helps children become creative and confident. For instance, team games teach children how to cooperate and follow rules, also through creative things they can enjoy doing some art and build creative thinking rather than always justifying right answer.
in conclusion, Formal learning should not be ignored however, playing is equally important for children's academics, practical, and social development. Moreover, they can also enjoy learning through some activities. in my opinion, primary schools should maintain balanced between study and play.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt by discussing the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and explaining the importance of play alongside study. The writer's position is clear throughout the essay. Ideas are extended and supported, such as when the student explains how mathematics helps with problem-solving and how teamwork activities improve communication skills. However, some arguments tend to over-generalise or are slightly repetitive, such as the multiple mentions of communication skills. Overall, the ideas are sufficiently developed to meet the requirements of a Band 6.5 or 7, and it sits comfortably at Band 6.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay displays a clear overall organisation with a logical progression of ideas from an introduction, through body paragraphs discussing formal learning and play respectively, to a concluding summary. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. However, cohesive devices are sometimes faulty or mechanical, and referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen with sentences starting abruptly or lacking smooth transitions (e.g., 'on the one hand, Children need...' and 'additionally, through several teamwork activities can improve...'). Furthermore, punctuation and capitalisation errors at the beginning of sentences detract slightly from the flow. These features place the response firmly in the Band 6 category.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating topic-specific terms such as 'academic learning', 'foundation', 'problem solving', 'teamwork activities', and 'creative thinking'. There are several attempts to use less common vocabulary, though this is sometimes accompanied by inaccuracy, such as 'practical and social skills' instead of 'practical and social skills development', and grammatical collocations like 'justifying right answer'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but word choice errors occasionally require the reader to interpret the meaning. These characteristics align with the Band 6 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as concessive clauses ('while others believe that...') and relative clauses. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and article use (e.g., 'primary school place too much emphasis', 'children's can reduces stress', 'helps children become', 'maintain balanced'). Punctuation and capitalisation are also problematic, with multiple sentences starting without capital letters. While communication is rarely impeded, these persistent errors and the limited control over complex structures prevent the grammar score from reaching a Band 6.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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