Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Primary education is the beginning of student's education life and it started from primary school. Some individual have a debate that primary institutions focus on theoritical education too much. I strongly agree with this view because children's brains have not that much ability to learn theoritical aspects.

First and foremost, I agree with this aspect because children can learn a thing more effectively by playing educational games rather than theory. Children's brains are not as developed as an adult. They can not learn and understand a easy thing as fast as an adult can. This is why visualization is very imporatant. It can play a crucial role to primary education. Moreover, they can understand everything if there is a visual aspect and the only way to initiate that is playing games with teachers in the classroom. For example, if children cannot learn the table of 2, they can easily understand if they play number of box games with teachers. It will be much easier than memorizing it.

In contrast, there are some drawbacks, theoritical education is a traditional way to teach children. So, there is no experienced teacher for teach them by playing games. Experienced teachers play a vital role in this terms of education. On the other hand, parents are not aware about this type of education because theoritical education is the most popular and traditional way all over the world. For instance, if a children try to learn a table or a essay by playing games then parents won't understand the meathod and they will complain to teachers. This will be a very complicated situation for schools and teachers to continue teaching in this meathod.

In conclusion, I strongly agree with the perspective that children should learn by playing games because it is very practical and effective meathod which can make education much easier and studnets can concentrate on their study rather than afraid of them. Although there are some concequences but students will benefited by this.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The candidate addresses all parts of the prompt, expressing a clear position of strong agreement that primary schools focus too much on formal learning, while also discussing the importance of play. The ideas are generally relevant, but the support tends to be repetitive and somewhat under-developed, particularly in the second and third body paragraphs where the same points regarding game-based learning and parental pressure are reiterated. For instance, the mention of learning 'the table of 2' through games is a relevant example, but the overall extension of ideas leans towards over-generalisation rather than thorough academic exploration. These limitations place the performance within Band 6, where all parts of the task are addressed, but some elements are under-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph structure, moving from an introduction to body paragraphs discussing benefits and drawbacks, and concluding with a summary. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. The candidate relies heavily on basic transition markers like 'First and foremost', 'In contrast', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. Furthermore, referencing and logical progression are occasionally impaired by poor phrasing and repetition, such as shifting abruptly into parental complaints without a smooth transitional link. Paragraphing is utilised, but internal cohesion within paragraphs lacks sophistication, warranting a Band 6 score.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'visual aspect', 'traditional way', and 'complicated situation'. However, there are numerous noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors that detract from precision. Examples include 'theoritical' instead of theoretical, 'impimoratant' for important, 'meathod' for method, and 'studnets' for students. Expressions like 'education life' and 'learn and understand a easy thing' further demonstrate limitations in lexical control. These errors do not completely impede communication, placing the response solidly at Band 5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, such as 'Some individual have a debate that primary institutions focus on theoritical education too much.' However, grammatical accuracy is weak, featuring frequent errors such as subject-verb agreement issues ('Some individual have'), incorrect articles ('a easy thing', 'a children'), and erroneous prepositional usage ('in this terms of education'). Furthermore, awkward sentence structures like 'children's brains have not that much ability' reveal a limited range of grammatical control when attempting to express abstract ideas. Because errors are frequent and occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, a Band 5 is appropriate.

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