Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this contemporary era, some people are of the opinion that the pattren of learning in primary school is not efficient enough. They focus more on formula learning rather than developing intelactual skill. I agree with the fact that book learning is one factor but on the other hand playing and experimenting new things is also very inportant.
Similarly, it has been proved in the history several times that, almost every scientist could not fit in their regular schools and over that they choose their own creativity and passion. Now a days, there are many schools who are working on this, however, there are many who are still following the same academic pattrens. The kids in those school never learn their true self, moreover many basic things are not introduced to them. For instance, they lack creativity, social interactions and confidence.
Consequently, these factors play a pivotal role in once personality. If a child is not given a chance to paly and do their favorite activities and sports then they are stoped to grow intellectually. This will creat a very negative effect on their mental health living them burdened and confused. A student who is more engaged in activities, studies more productively.
Taking everything into consideration, I am of the opinion that playing and sports are very crucial for a kids physical as well as mental health. It enhances their way of thinking and prceeding a task more efficiently.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses the two-part prompt by discussing whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and explaining the importance of play alongside study. However, the development of ideas remains somewhat superficial. For instance, the mention that almost every scientist could not fit in regular schools is a sweeping and unsupported generalization. Furthermore, the task achievement is impacted by the negative length check, as the response falls short of the 250-word minimum at 239 words. Consequently, the position is clear, but the argumentation lacks full extension and thorough support across the body paragraphs, aligning this response with a Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The text demonstrates a basic organizational structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a concluding sentence. However, the overall progression is sometimes disrupted by abrupt shifts in ideas and awkward transitions. Cohesive devices are used, but they are occasionally mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'Similarly' to introduce the point about scientists. Paragraphing is attempted, though the division of ideas could be managed more logically to guide the reader smoothly from the critique of formal learning to the benefits of play. Referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly with pronouns like 'they' and 'those school', which creates ambiguity regarding the intended referents. These features place the response firmly at Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student attempts some less common vocabulary items such as 'contemporary era', 'pivotal role', and 'intellectually', but there are numerous spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text. Examples include 'pattren' instead of 'pattern', 'formula learning' instead of 'formal learning', 'intelactual' instead of 'intellectual', 'inportant' instead of 'important', 'pattrens' instead of 'patterns', 'stoped' instead of 'stopped', 'creat' instead of 'create', 'living' instead of 'leaving', and 'prceeding' instead of 'proceeding'. These noticeable errors and misspellings cause some difficulty for the reader and restrict the lexical score to Band 5.0, despite an adequate attempt at topical vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as conditional structures ('If a child is not given a chance...'). However, control over grammar is inconsistent, and frequent errors occur, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'almost every scientist could not fit... and over that they choose' and prepositional or phrasing errors like 'in the history several times' and 'on their mental health living them burdened'. Punctuation is generally basic, and articles are occasionally misused or omitted. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader, matching the description for Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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