Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people contend that primary educational institutions put a huge emphasis on formal education; following the wide-spread academic competition. I strongly agree with the point, and I believe that a balance between games and learining is crucial at primary level education.

Primary schools prioritise formal education over games to demonstrate academic achievements. Their focal point is rote memorization since it bring instant results and also brings considerable fame. This happens owing to the ubiquitous academic competition between the institutions and kids to achieve higher grades. This vicious race brings clossal effect on kids kids emotional and psychological well-being. A compelling illustration of this can be found in elite schools of Pakistan, such as Roots International where they give grave importance to academica that led to frustration and anger in kids suggesting that academics solely cannot bring favourable results in kids education.

Games and atheletics are of paramount importance for kids emotional, physical and psychological health. While playing games, kids physical stamina increases that in turn boosts their adrenaline resulting into happiness and stress reduction. Not only this, games also incorporates teamwork, problem solving and anger management in kids. In addition, these skills improve creativity that aids in students' academic and professional growth. Fineland, for example, is famous for its balance between games and learning resulting into measurable academic progress and students mental and physical health. This demonstrates that learning along with play brings positive results in kids at primary level.

To conclude, primary educational institutes prioritise academic learning while neglecting the importance of games owing to the prevalant academic competition. However, games along with learning double the impact on learning as well as on students' well-being. This balance will ultimately be the best way teaching pupils at primary level,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt successfully. The writer clearly states their position on the focus of formal learning in primary schools and explains the importance of play alongside learning. Ideas are extended and supported with relevant examples, such as reference to elite schools in Pakistan and the educational model in Finland. The position is maintained clearly throughout the essay, and the development is logical and adequate for a Band 7 performance under this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay is logically organised with a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing each prompt part, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. Cohesive devices are employed to connect sentences and arguments, such as 'While playing games', 'In addition', and 'To conclude'. However, referencing and transitions are at times slightly mechanical or repetitive, placing the response solidly at Band 6.5 or rounding to 6.0 based on minor flaws in connective flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate and generally appropriate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'ubiquitous academic competition', 'vicious race', and 'paramount importance'. However, there are several spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, including 'learining' instead of learning, 'bring' instead of brings, 'clossal' instead of colossal, 'academica' instead of academics, 'atheletics' instead of athletics, 'Fineland' instead of Finland, and 'prevalant' instead of prevalent. These errors do not impede communication but prevent the score from reaching Band 7.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied subordination and relative clauses. There are, however, frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that persist, such as 'since it bring instant results', 'kids kids emotional', 'where they give grave importance', and 'best way teaching pupils'. Punctuation is also slightly faulty at the end of the text where a comma is used instead of a full stop. Despite these errors, communication is rarely impeded, warranting a Band 6.

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