Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many individuals believe that the primary school system give a lot of its focus to just formal education. I partially agree with this statement, as nowadays schools are giving more focus to practical activities, along with their academic tasks. I think it is very crucial for the children to have some kind of extracurricular activities because students with these feel refreshed and concentrate more on their studies. This essay will examine my personal opinion and the importance of play for children in schools.

To begin with, primary schools had focused only on formal learning. However, nowadays they also pay attention to the extra activities, alongside formal studies of the students. In recent years, school administration and teachers give the attention to students refreshment and their entertainment, in order to keep students interested and concentrated with their studies. For instance, in most schools there is one specific class for the extra activities, in which different children play different kinds of indoor and outdoor sports according to their interests. Furthermore, some schools arrange tournaments of different sports such as cricket and football etc., with the collaboration of other schools for the purpose of entertainment and enjoyment of students.

On the other hand, some underdeveloped and smaller schools with fewer facilities and arrangement systems also lack of qualified teachers and fewer students still only rely on. Moreover, it is really important and beneficial for the children to play, along with their formal classroom studies. Students can feel more refreshed and it also helps in their grooming. For example, students who take part in some kind of activity within the school. This way, they can feel less burdened and their minds can be free of the academic pressure and chaos. It also helps in the popularity of the school.

In conclusion, schools are giving much more attention to extra activities nowadays rather than the formal education. It is for the betterment of both the children and school, as this can make children feel overwhelmed and the schools become more popular and well-known.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the two-part prompt by discussing the extent of formal learning focus and examining the importance of play in primary schools. A clear position is established in the introduction, where the writer states they 'partially agree' that schools focus too much on formal learning. Ideas are generally relevant, such as mentioning sports tournaments and student refreshment, but some points become repetitive or under-developed, particularly in the third paragraph where the sentence 'also lack of qualified teachers and fewer students still only rely on' is incomplete and lacks clarity. Furthermore, the conclusion contradicts the introduction by stating that 'schools are giving much more attention to extra activities nowadays rather than the formal education,' which blurs the clarity of the overall position. Overall, the task is addressed adequately, fitting the criteria for a Band 6.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph-by-paragraph structure that follows a standard essay layout, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to signal transitions, such as 'To begin with,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion.' However, paragraphing and referencing are sometimes faulty. For instance, the transition 'On the other hand' does not accurately contrast the preceding paragraph, and referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in the incomplete thought in paragraph three ('still only rely on'). The progression of ideas becomes slightly muddled towards the end due to abrupt shifts in focus, placing this performance solidly at Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'extracurricular activities,' 'refreshment,' 'academic pressure,' and 'collaboration.' However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward word choices throughout the text. Examples include 'system give' instead of 'system gives,' 'extra activities' used repeatedly where 'extracurricular activities' or 'recreational activities' would be more precise, and the phrase 'grooming' used inappropriately to mean personal development or socialisation. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they prevent the lexical score from reaching Band 7.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures with subordinate clauses such as 'in order to keep students interested' and 'students who take part in some kind of activity.' However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are several noticeable errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('the primary school system give'), missing prepositions or incomplete predicate structures ('also lack of qualified teachers and fewer students still only rely on'), and sentence fragments like 'For example, students who take part in some kind of activity within the school.' Punctuation and article usage also show frequent minor slips. These errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, aligning with Band 5.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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