Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people believe that primary schools only focus on formal lerning rather than any activity or playing games. It is also important for children to play as well as learning. I strongly agree with this statement and this essay will highlight the reasons as well as examples in upcoming paragraph.

To start with, the first and foremost reason for focusing on formal learning is gaining knowledge. schools believe that children should have to spent their time on subjects rather than playing. For example- if they will focus on learning subjects, they might have good career in future. They can run any business rather than doing job and they also learn skill from practical learning. Apart from this, formal learning also develop the communication skills and discipline in children.

However, children also have to play games because they need to relax their mind if they do not these activites like these they might have serious problems like depression because of burden of studies. In addition, if they play games they can develop team work in them and can be physically strong.

To conclude, although it is important to play games with formal learning in schools to develop the skills like team work, and to keep them fit yet the importance of playing can not be overlooked.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

This response addresses the task only partially and fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 250 words, coming in at 215 words. While you present a clear position in the introduction stating that you strongly agree and that playing is important, your ideas are somewhat limited and under-developed. For instance, when discussing formal learning, you mention that children can run businesses rather than do jobs, but this point lacks sufficient extension and support. Furthermore, while you briefly address both parts of the prompt regarding formal learning and play, the overall treatment of the second part about the classroom environment remains basic. To reach a higher level, you must fully develop all parts of the prompt with well-supported explanations and ensure you write over the word minimum.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is some basic organisation in your essay, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but overall progression is lacking. You attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To start with', 'Apart from this', and 'However', but some of these links feel repetitive or mechanical. Paragraphing is attempted, though the division of ideas could be clearer and more logically sequenced. For example, your third paragraph jumps quickly between mental relaxation, depression, teamwork, and physical strength without clear transitions between these distinct concepts. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'if they do not these activites like these they might have serious problems'. To improve cohesion, you should ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single core theme with smooth transitions connecting your ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary range is limited but minimally adequate to communicate your basic points about education and play. You attempt some less common words, such as 'communication skills', 'discipline', and 'depression', but there are noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word form that occasionally cause difficulty. For instance, you misspelled 'learning' as 'lerning' and 'activities' as 'activites'. You also used awkward phrasing such as 'spent their time on subjects' instead of spending time studying subjects. There is a heavy reliance on repetitive everyday vocabulary like 'formal learning', 'play games', and 'children'. To achieve a higher score, you need to expand your lexical range by incorporating more precise academic synonyms and ensuring correct spelling and collocations throughout your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

Your writing demonstrates a limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside a few attempts at complex forms that are often faulty. You make frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('schools believe that children should have to spent', where the infinitive should follow 'to'), missing articles ('have good career in future'), and preposition or punctuation mistakes (such as the dangling dash in 'For example-'). Conditional structures also contain errors, as seen in 'if they play games they can develop team work in them and can be physically strong'. These frequent errors can cause some difficulty for the reader. To improve your grammar score, you should practice forming complex sentences accurately, check your verb tenses carefully, and pay closer attention to articles and prepositions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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