Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Children adopt quickly with their environment. In this contemporary world, myriad of people support the idea that academic learning should be introduced at primary levels. Although this might have considerable merits, I'm firmly convinced that classroom should foster learning by playing model to teach children with useful skills and knowlege instead of academic learning.
One of the important reasons why I believe that primary schools should introduce their students with playful activities while educating them is because early childhood period is a development phase. In other words, when children are only exposed to a formal learning setting at early childhood phase, they are more likely to only develop theoretical knowledge and understanding. For instance, in Nepal the government has prohibited primary school to conduct any examination since 2025 and has introduce interactive learning classroom. Therefore, the schools should start teaching them about real world, consequences of their choices, and behavioural learnings through playful lessons. This clearly demonstrates how useful those skills would be to shape their future.
Futhermore, formal learning introduce them with examination to test their capacity, which creates unnecessary performation pressure earlier in their development phase. This not only impacts their mental health but also effects their confident level. Consequently, primary level children would start associating their success with the score cards. This means that childrens' mental wellbeing will be negatively impacted. For example, in Indian education system is hugely based on merits and scores due to which children are found less likely to entrench any useful skills. Therefore, I personally support the idea of toddlers being exposed to learning through playing environment.
Taking everything into account, although there might be some advances of formal learning in early childhood and remain to be a divisive topic; however, I remain firmly convinced that it is a myopic solution. Instead, I strongly believe that primary school classroom should prioritize games and educating students in a interactive space.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0
The response successfully addresses all parts of the two-part prompt, presenting a clear position throughout the essay. The writer clearly states their disagreement with excessive formal learning and argues for playful primary school classrooms. Ideas are well extended and supported, such as when the author discusses the developmental phase of early childhood and provides relevant examples from Nepal and India. However, there is a slight tendency to over-generalize in parts, such as broad claims about the Indian education system, which prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Overall, the task is answered thoroughly with relevant and developed arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay demonstrates a clear overall progression with a logical organization of ideas from introduction to conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with each body paragraph focusing on a distinct point regarding mental health, pressure, and skill development. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well, such as 'In other words', 'Therefore', and 'Futhermore', which show a clear structural relationship between sentences. However, cohesion can sometimes feel slightly mechanical or repetitive in its transitional phrasing. Referencing is generally clear, though minor slips in referencing links prevent the response from achieving a fully flexible cohesion score.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, providing a sufficient range to allow some flexibility and precision. The student successfully attempts less common vocabulary items such as 'contemporary world', 'myriad of people', 'development phase', and 'myopic solution'. However, there are notable word choice, word form, and spelling inaccuracies that occur throughout the text, such as 'adopt quickly with' instead of 'adapt quickly to', 'knowlege', 'introduction' forms like 'introduce them with examination' instead of 'introduces', 'performation' instead of 'performance', 'effects' instead of 'affects', and 'confident level' instead of 'confidence level'. These errors do not seriously impede communication but keep the lexical score at this level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting complex structures like conditional or concessive clauses with varying degrees of success. There are several grammatical errors present across the text, including issues with prepositions, articles, and pluralization, such as 'classroom should foster' (missing article), 'prohibited primary school to conduct' instead of 'prohibited primary schools from conducting', 'has introduce' instead of 'has introduced', and 'in Indian education system' (missing article). Punctuation and verb agreement errors also occur, such as 'childrens' mental wellbeing'. These represent frequent non-impeding errors rather than rare slips, reflecting a control pattern typical of this band.
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