Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, many people have arguemnet that primary school mostly foces on formal learning. I partly agree with this statement because academic learning is important, but children should also have time to play and develope other skills.

Allthough, Academic learning is very important for the children with it's help they can learn the subjects that they have to study in future. This will help them in future studies. Allthough, putting to much pressure on child is also not conceder good because of pressure child can take stress and can not concentrate on studies. For example Giving constant pressure of studies to child will make him or her stressfull and because of it they always think about it which can negativily effects its socal life.

Now taking about importance of playing in the life of children. I think it is as important as academic study is important since playing is important for the development of the child as child have time for play and it play different sports and meet new people which will give him help in making new good friends since good friends are really important in life and also it will help him to improve social skills that will help him alots in future while playing children acn learn many skill. For instance playing in a team they can learn skill of teamwork and communication.

In conclusion, formal learning is important for development of child and will help in future but we can overlook the benifits of playing it is also as important as learning is children can also learn skill while playing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing whether primary schools focus too much on formal learning and exploring the importance of play alongside academic study. A clear position is presented throughout the essay. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For example, while the discussion on the benefits of play for social skills is reasonably extended with the mention of teamwork and communication, the points regarding academic pressure leading to stress are somewhat repetitive and lack deeper elaboration or specific examples beyond general statements. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to provide more fully developed arguments and robust examples for all aspects of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into an introduction, body paragraphs addressing each part of the prompt, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used to separate main ideas. Nevertheless, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical. Words such as 'Allthough' and transitions like 'Now taking about' create a slightly unnatural flow. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, as seen in pronoun use such as 'because of it they always think about it which can negativily effects its socal life'. To improve, the writer should employ a wider and more natural range of cohesive devices and ensure smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, providing an understandable response despite noticeable limitations. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'development', 'teamwork', and 'communication', but there are numerous lexical errors in word choice, word form, and spelling throughout the text. Examples include 'arguemnet' instead of 'argument', 'foces' instead of 'focus', 'develope' instead of 'develop', 'conceder' instead of considered, 'stressfull' instead of stressful, 'socal' instead of social, 'alots' instead of a lot, 'acn' instead of can, and 'benifits' instead of benefits. These errors indicate a limited lexical range and spelling control, which restrict the score in this category.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on basic patterns alongside some attempts at complex sentences. However, these attempts at complex structures are often faulty. There are frequent grammatical errors involving subject-verb agreement, verb forms, and punctuation that cause some difficulty for the reader. Instances of grammatical inaccuracy include 'children with it's help they can learn', 'putting to much pressure on child', 'negativily effects its socal life', and missing articles or pluralization errors such as 'as child have time for play'. To progress, the writer needs to demonstrate better control over complex sentence forms and significantly reduce basic grammatical errors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.