Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Most of the people argue that primary education departments are very strict on formal learning. I warmheartedly agree with this view, as academic education is important, but children should also have sufficient opportunities to play.
To begin with, formal learning plays an important role in a child's life. With the help of formal learning a child became responsible and hardworking guy. In most of primary schools the department only focuses on formal learning. Ar primary school, children need to develop basic skills such as reading, writing and mathematics. These skuills provides a strong foundation to their future education and help them becoming more confident learners. For instance, a child who learns these basic skills earlier could have an access to learn other tough skills easily and in future he would not have to face a problem about his skills. Hence, academic learning plays a vital role in a childs life.
However, i believe that playing is also very significant in a childs life. Play can help them develop creativity, communication skills and teamwork with other person. Moreover, play is very importanat in a childs life because when a child is tired of hectic life and his brain responds a little bit then paly refreshes the mind of a child and it makes the mind of a child more sharp .In this way, students can learn important skills without feeling that they are constantly studying.
In conclusion, although formal learning in necessary for child's academic development yet play is also very vital in a childs health or learning also.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the two-part prompt, acknowledging that primary schools focus too much on formal learning and discussing the importance of play alongside study. However, some aspects are under-developed. For example, while the student mentions that formal learning builds foundational skills like reading and mathematics, the explanation of how play specifically contributes to child development remains somewhat generalised and repetitive, relying on broad statements such as 'play refreshes the mind'. The position is clear throughout, but deeper elaboration with more specific examples or personal experiences would be needed to push the ideas further.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear staging of ideas from the introduction, through body paragraphs covering both formal learning and play, to a logical conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different arguments. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty, with repetitive transition phrases and occasional referencing issues, such as 'when a child is tired... and his brain responds a little bit then paly refreshes'. While the relationships between ideas are generally understandable, the flow would benefit from a wider and more flexible variety of cohesive devices rather than basic linking words.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate vocabulary range for the task, successfully communicating everyday academic concepts like 'foundation', 'creativity', and 'teamwork'. However, there are noticeable word-choice and spelling errors that affect precision, such as 'warmheartedly', 'skuills', 'importanat', and 'paly'. There are also awkward collocations and informal phrasing, such as 'hardworking guy' instead of 'hardworking student' or 'diligent learner'. While these lexical slips and spelling mistakes do not entirely impede communication, they restrict the vocabulary score by showing a limited control over less common lexical items.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, such as 'although formal learning in necessary for child's academic development yet play is also very vital'. There are several grammatical errors regarding articles, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions, including 'a child became', 'in most of primary schools', 'childs life', and missing articles in 'in necessary for child's academic development'. Although these errors are frequent enough to highlight limited structural control, they rarely impede the reader's overall understanding of the text, fitting the pattern of a mixture of accurate and flawed structures.
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