Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

School plays crucial role for the foundation of the education purpose. Although, formal learning clear basic concept of primary school students but excessively used of this resources deviate the interest of students. I think Spontaneous learning is more effective for the early students and some other activities like playing enhance the ability of students to learn and grow more fastly.

It shoul

macro keyword: learning

Micro primary school focus

extent of agree or not

opinion about primary school children play as well learn

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response only minimally addresses the prompt due to its severe underlength, containing only eighty-three words against the mandatory two hundred and fifty-word minimum. While the writer manages to touch upon the core topic of primary schools focusing on formal learning and briefly introduces an opinion regarding spontaneous learning and play, the ideas are left extremely rudimentary and lack proper development. The prompt asks to what extent the writer agrees and the importance of play, but the short length prevents any substantial extension of these points. To achieve a higher score, the response would need to fully explore both parts of the task with extended explanations and relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The response demonstrates minimal overall organization, with ideas arranged in a single short paragraph followed by disjointed drafting notes. Information and ideas lack clear progression and logical sequencing. Cohesive devices are largely absent, except for the introductory conjunction 'Although,' which is used incorrectly without a main clause, resulting in a fragmented sentence structure. Referencing is weak, making it difficult to follow the logical flow of the argument. To improve in this criterion, the writer must use paragraphing appropriately, sequence ideas logically, and employ a variety of cohesive devices to connect sentences and paragraphs smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, occasionally straining the reader's comprehension. Words and phrases such as 'crucial role', 'formal learning', and 'primary school students' show some awareness of topic-related terminology, but there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'education purpose' instead of 'educational purposes', 'excessively used of this resources', and growing 'more fastly' instead of 'more quickly'. The limited range makes it difficult to convey precise meanings. To reach a higher band, the writer needs to incorporate a wider range of less common vocabulary with greater accuracy in word choice, collocation, and word formation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical range is very limited, consisting primarily of simple sentences with frequent errors that distort meaning and cause difficulty for the reader. There are notable issues with verb forms, subject-verb agreement, and articles, such as 'School plays crucial role' missing the article 'a', and 'clear basic concept' missing the plural 's'. The sentence beginning with 'Although' is grammatically incomplete, and the comparative adverb 'more fastly' contains a morphological error. To improve, the writer should incorporate a mix of accurate simple and complex sentence structures, ensure correct grammatical agreements, and minimize errors in tense and word forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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